I anxiously searched Leon’s name on the Starnet, over and over again.

  Even though I knew it was pointless and that nothing would pop up, I couldn’t rex. What would the news headline be? Something like ‘First Child of Astersin Family Attempts to Roofie Man?’

  And for another, there was the question of how Leon got the drugs. Depending on the answer, this could get way worse. I scrolled through his medical records—my family being what it was, I had access to some stuff I shouldn’t have—then realized there was a far easier way for him to get what he wanted.

  Hurrying back to my room and mini office, I opened my private cabinet, then frowned in irritation. My hidden stash! Ransacked! Oh, fuck you, Leonard. I’ll have to change my passcode again. Maybe my birthday being the code was too easy?

  Good news, it looked like Leon didn’t use any questionable channels. Bad news, said safe channel happened to be me. Welp. There went my excuse if word ever got out to Uncle. It wouldn’t only be Leon who would be nagged at—I would be too. Leon always dragged me into his messes, didn’t he?

  Absent-mindedly, I wondered why Leon had drugged Elliot in the first pce. If it were me, I wouldn't act so recklessly. It couldn’t be a spur of the moment thing, or just because of a rejection, right? Was it an accident? Or did something happen to Leon?

  My thoughts drifted back to a week or so ago, when Leon first mentioned his little crush:

  “His hair… it’s like wheat, and his eyes…” Leon murmured.

  I didn’t reply, instead sipping on my drink, savouring the sour and bitter taste. But my head tilted towards him, listening.

  “But I don’t know how to talk to him,” Leon continued, cheeks flushed, voice zy, “He’s like a little mouse. Everytime I try to get close, he scurries away.”

  “Maybe you scare him.” I said, grinning, setting down my gss with a clink, “It’s your face. Or maybe you're so fucking rich you make him anxious.”

  “It’s… not that,” Leon said uncertainly, reaching out for another bottle of liquor, “El doesn’t care about money. He doesn’t… El won’t judge.”

  “He sees me for me.”

  Parts of his words were mumbled out. There was a hissing sound, the sound of dispersing carbon dioxide, as he broke open the cap of the bottle and poured himself another gss to drink. I shrugged.

  “Dude, you’ve had too much.” I reprimanded him with a sigh, “You’ve had six gsses, and if you keep going, you’re definitely going to have a killer headache tomorrow.”

  As I said this, I reached for the gss instead and drank it all in one gulp. Leon was too out of it to protest, and I grinned seeing Leon’s tipsy form. It wasn’t that Leon was a lightweight, but I was blessed with good genes—I’d never gotten drunk before.

  "And besides," I added, attempting more banter, "I don't judge, either. You’re saying it like he’s the only one who sees you for you. What about me?"

  My fingers tapped the counter pyfully as I watched Leon, his sleepy face pressed on the table.

  “You…” Leon mumbled.

  “Yeah, me. Even though you’re rich as fuck, I still treat you like the trash you are, don’t I?” I said, “Fancy trash, maybe, but you’re still trash, until you get rid of that horrid temper.”

  Leon rolled to the side, watching me bnkly. I waited for him to answer. He paused, a small, silly smile pying on the edge of his lips.

  "He's different. Different…"

  Different.

  My fingers stopped tapping, and the corners of my mouth lowered, as I paused, deep in thought. Leon closed his eyes, completely and fully asleep. His hair, slick with sweat, fell onto the counter, and his hands lost its grip on his gss, falling to the side.

  "Different? What do you mean by…." I trailed off.

  Different? What did that mean? Different from who? Me?

  Maybe it was the alcohol, but my brain went bnk. I couldn’t compute what he meant, what he meant by ‘different’, what he meant by…that stupid smile I’d never seen before.

  So Leon had a crush, I understood that. I wasn’t mad. Whoever this El was, clearly cared about Leon and treated him well, like just a normal guy, not someone rich and powerful to fear or suck up to. And Leon liked that about him. Sure, it was stupid, but why not.

  But what about us? Me. My parents, retives, and Leon’s uncle, who all looked after us. And all the other people assisting Leon behind him, all of us who trusted him, who put our futures into his hands as our future employer, as Leon, and as a friend…

  Was it that again?

  A bitter, burning taste lingered on my tongue, the aftertaste of the alcohol.

  Did he still not trust anyone, believing we would throw it all aside if he ever lost the war to be the heir to the family? Even me? Even though I've been with him for so long, even though I’d put in so much work, did he still doubt all the fucked up stuff I’d been through with him?

  And was he going to obsess over some stupid crush instead? Unwilling to rely on me, just like st time—

  My hands hurt. It was only then I realized I’d been gripping my drink too hard, and I had to force myself to rex.

  It was just a random thought, nothing too serious. I trusted Leon, he trusted me, and I would be a fool for doubting him in that aspect. Still, I wondered why I felt so bothered by his words, even as I brushed them away.

  Maybe it was fear that Leon might get hurt. Or maybe it was something else, something more selfish—

  Fear that he would push me away.

  I observed Leon, hesitating for a moment, before poking at his cheek in revenge for all the annoyance he was making me feel. It might be childish, but it made me feel a little better.

  Yeah, I was just kidding myself. Everything would be fine, and I couldn’t believe I was getting worked up over something so stupid. A crush was just a crush. Happens to everyone.

  Heat climbed onto the side of my neck and face, dying it a pale pink.

  It must be the alcohol talking, indeed.

  StoneInky