I awoke to a delectable scent drifting over to me and making my mouth water. I licked my lips, glancing around the room and finding that the table was now overflowing with delicious food and drink. Pitchers of some red citrusy juice, bottles of wine, plates of sliced ham and potatoes. An entire roasted chicken sat on a platter just begging me to taste it.
Glancing around but seeing nobody in the room with me, I ripped one of the legs off and chomped heartily. The juices dripped down my mouth as I moaned, my eyes closed. It was the most delicious piece of meat ever. Well… the second most.
Forgetting my manners, I ripped into the food at the table, chugging juice straight from the glass and stuffing my face with meats and cheese. Once I was stuffed, I wiped my face off with a fancy cloth napkin and burped loudly.
“Oh man… that was good!”
I caught a reflection of myself in one of the polished silver circles that sat under the ceramic plates like a coaster and blinked.
“Um… Hey!” I shouted toward the metal doors. “Is there a mirror anywhere in here?”
The doors slid open a moment later and Dick rolled a large engraved mirror into the room, pushing it to the corner and looking at me for approval.
“Oh. Yeah, there’s good. Thanks, man.”
He grunted, nodding to me and walking back out the door he’d come through. I had that monster just outside my door? Or was he coincidentally delivering the mirror just when I’d asked for it? Not likely.
To confirm, I poked my head out through the automatic doors, his huge back blocking my view. Quietly, I backed into the room and let the doors close themselves without a sound.
I moved to the mirror, then, standing in front of it and appraising my new body.
“Holy… Would I have looked this good if I wasn’t sick for as long as I can remember?”
The man grinning back at me from the clean surface was far more attractive than I ever was. Instead of skin pulled tightly over bone, my body actually had some meat to it. I probably would’ve cried with joy if I wasn’t so fascinated with my newly acquired abs!
I had to unbutton the weird shirt I was wearing to get to them. Four buttons held the vest-like garment to my chest in a square shape. It looked nice, and not at all as though I’d just been discovered under the rubble of a skyscraper.
White cloth pants tucked into black leather boots were held to my waist by a matching leather belt with a silver buckle, and I smirked as I realized the engraved symbol was an anaconda.
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Well played, Goddfried… Well played…
I turned my head from side to side, admiring my chiseled jawline and fresh haircut. My dark sea-green eyes were the same as always, but they seemed to shine with a life I’d never seen in them. I winked, smiling with perfect teeth that I’d never have been able to afford back on Earth, and laughed at my good fortune.
And then I laughed at the good fortune I could share with the ladies.
Objects in the mirror are bigger than they appear. I snickered before pushing the dirty thoughts aside and refocusing on the room around me. I couldn’t help but stare at myself as I moved though, gazing in wonder as I examined the toned muscles I actually now had.
Death would’ve been so worth it if I hadn’t left everyone behind.
My smile faded as I thought that, but I forced myself to concentrate on something else, like the crackling of the fire in the hearth I hadn’t noticed was in the corner of the room.
“Seriously? This is a spaceship? This feels more like a mansion!”
A warm voice from behind said, “I’m glad you find the accommodations to your liking.”
I whirled, knocking over an empty silver goblet and staring at what I could only imagine was a king. Long dark hair hung down in two strands from the sides of his forehead, held away from his face by a gleaming golden band that rested firmly above his brow. Intricate runes decorated the band, and two matching bracelets adorned his wrists. A brown cloak hung down from his shoulders to his ankles, cinched around his waist by yet another engraved golden band. He was barefoot, and I realized his nails were also painted gold.
Weird style, but you do you, boo.
Realizing I hadn’t fixed what I’d knocked over, I hastily apologized, picking up the goblet and replacing it, but the man smiled and waved the matter away.
“It’s alright, Lord Kane. My ship is your ship, for as long as you need it.” He spread his hands, gesturing around me, but I was too busy trying to figure out why he’d called me “Lord Kane”.
Then I remembered my interaction with the captain.
“Lia,” I said, accidentally aloud.
“Ah, yes, the captain who transported you. She is giving her report to Lord Bracchus right now.” The man smacked his head. “Ah! Forgive me for failing to introduce myself properly! I am Lord Reese. You may address me as Reese, or by my formal title: Munlord, if you prefer.”
“Munlord?” I dumbly asked, even though I understood what he’d said. The humans on Semma were run by lords of various statuses, and commanding lords of a city-state had unique titles of their own.
Reese smiled, twisting his head and squinting humorously at me. “Yes, Munlord. You didn’t hit your head too badly, did you, Aaron? Uh, may I call you Aaron?”
“Sure.”
Reese nodded. “The medics said your vital signs were all clear.” He frowned. “Is this not the case?”
I shook my head. “Ah, no, I’m fine, thanks. Actually, I was just surprised to be meeting with a regional lord.”
“Well, you’re one yourself, aren’t you? I was told by Lia that your formal title is Schlonglord. A bit difficult for me to pronounce, but I’ll get the hang of it, to be sure.”
I realized then that the area I’d woken up in must’ve been the recently devastated city of Scharn, the one location I’d really been informed of in the book. From what I could remember, Scharn was a city-state that kept itself mostly isolated from the others. It sent aid when other states needed it, but the government itself was mostly shrouded in mystery.
That… works out perfectly?
“Yep. Totally am. Schlonglord, that’s me.”
