“Oh, thank the Gods above…” Melanie groaned out as the four of them stepped through the door to their shared room. “I thought my legs were about to fall off from all that walking and fighting…”
“I can share the sentiment, even if I can’t share your desire to thank the Gods for anything,” Carmine said, wincing as she did so. “Okay, maybe you did have a point, Chase – maybe I should have taken you up on those early-morning workout offers…”
“Told you,” Chase taunted. “Victoria and I are fine, at least. Right, Vicky?”
Victoria’s eye twitched. “I am tempted to command you not to call me that, but I know that if I do, it will only encourage you to keep doing it anyway to spite me.”
“That’s the spirit.” Chase turned back towards Melanie and Carmine, and gave them a shrug. “I guess I’ll have mercy on you two and concede the bathroom to you both first. That being said, if you use all the hot water, I will make you pay for it.”
Carmine rolled her eyes, then conjured a flame in her hand. “I can heat my own water, Chase. Melanie is the one you should be telling that to.”
“Good point.”
“Oh, come on,” Melanie protested. “When have I ever used all the hot water to the point where the rest of you didn’t get any?”
“Melanie, you do that at least once a week,” Victoria pointed out. “Because you insist on taking long baths. What are you even doing in there that takes at least twenty minutes, anyway? Can’t be anything good.”
“I-” Melanie suddenly paused, her eyes going wide as she hesitated. Finally, she let out a huff and crossed her arms. “...That’s none of your business.”
“Oh, so it’s like that, huh?” Chase said, nodding in understanding. “I see.”
“See what? What do you see? You don’t see shit, Chase. Shut up.”
“No, keep talking,” Carmine insisted. “I want to know exactly what nasty shit you think she’s getting up to in there. I have to use that bathroom too, after all.”
Chase smirked. “Well, it’s quite simple, really-”
“Chase,” Melanie warned, her face flushing red as she ground her teeth.
“-A certain someone seems to enjoy having a date with rosie palms in the bathroom. You know what I mean? I can spell it out for you with another euphemism if you don’t.”
“That’s quite alright,” Carmine said. “I think we get the idea-”
“She’s massaging the roast beef, you know? Riding the two-fingered bucking bronco, if you will. Going knuckle-deep in the pink pit. She’s-”
“Alright, alright, that’s enough,” Victoria insisted, causing Chase to stop talking. She sighed, then brought a hand up to her face, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Melanie… just don’t use all the hot water while you do it, alright?”
Melanie was fuming at this point, and took that as her cue to retreat into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her as she did so. A few seconds of silence passed before the faint sound of running water filled the room, and Carmine cleared her throat.
“Of course, you all realize that now she’s going to use all the hot water out of pure spite.”
“It was worth it,” Chase declared. “I haven’t seen her that flustered in ages. Funny shit.”
“Don’t you think that was going a little too far?” Victoria asked.
“What do you mean? She’s the one doing it, not me. I’m not sorry.”
“Somehow, that’s about the answer I was expecting. Never mind, then.”
Victoria took a seat on the edge of her bed – the one she shared with Melanie. There were only two beds in the room; her and Melanie shared the one closest to the door, while Carmine took the one next to it for herself, and Chase slept on the floor. It wasn’t exactly a comfortable arrangement for him, but Carmine had made it clear that she would rather light the bed on fire than share it with him, and he didn’t exactly want to share a bed with Melanie, for obvious reasons. That left just Victoria to share with, which they’d actually tried a few times, only for it to end in disaster because she hogged all the covers and sheets in her sleep.
And also because Chase slept in his underwear, and that had always felt awkward for the two of them so long as they shared a bed.
Chase shook those thoughts from his head, instead focusing on Victoria. She was staring at the wall, seemingly lost in thought over something. Chase’s brow furrowed.
“Hey,” he said, getting her attention. “What’s with you? Is something wrong?”
Victoria blinked in surprise. “...No, not really,” she answered. “It’s just… I’ve got some things running through my mind at the moment.”
“Like what? Is it the thought of Melanie dancing with herself in there? Because if so, I understand completely; I wish I could un-see that particular picture in my mind’s eye as well.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not that. The nobleman who the bandits killed earlier… I recognize who that was.”
Chase blinked, then exchanged a glance with Carmine. “...You do?” Carmine asked.
Victoria nodded. “Yeah. He was actually a… sort-of relative of mine. I recognized his calling card; he liked keeping small Mimics as pets, and stored his valuables inside of them.”
“Well, he certainly sounds quirky and weird enough for you to be related to him,” Chase said. This earned him a glare, which he ignored. “Anyway, you said you were only sort-of related to him… what does that mean?”
If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.
“It means he’s part of my extended family,” Victoria said, crossing her arms. “My very extended family, that is.”
“How extended are we talking?” Carmine questioned.
“Hard to say. The roots of my family tree stretch so far and wide that I can’t even begin to trace them all. And before you ask – no, I can’t tell you much more about it than that. I’ve actually never met my own father, even though I know who he is.”
“That doesn’t make much sense,” Chase replied. “Why can’t you tell us anything about him, and how do you know who he is if you’ve never met him?”
Victoria hesitated. “...It’s complicated,” she offered. “I’m not proud of who he is, if you couldn’t gather that already. I’d prefer to keep that information to myself at this point.”
Chase’s brow furrowed. “Why? By my estimations, you’ve already said too much.” Carmine elbowed him in the ribs. “I mean… sure, whatever. Not like we can force that information out of you.”
Carmine let out a tired sigh. “Look, it’s probably too late to go digging into this right now. All I want to know is… will this affect the group negatively in any way, shape, or form?”
“No, it won’t,” Victoria stated emphatically. “My relatives are spread very far and wide. It would take a literal act of the Gods to bring even a fraction of us together in one place. The fact that we came across one of them like this is nothing short of sheer coincidence, not to mention statistics. That is to say, we were bound to come across a family member of mine at some point simply due to sheer numbers, and I’m just thankful that he was already dead when we crossed paths with him.”
Chase tilted his head. “You were thankful he died? You must not have liked the guy very much.”
Victoria let out a derisive snort. “You could say that. The majority of my family members are terrible people. I won’t get into the reasons why now; it doesn’t affect me much, anyway, aside from making me not want to see them ever. At this point, the only concerns I have about my dead relative are whether or not he voided his bowels on the way out, and only because the mental image of that bastard shitting himself as he died is funny to me.”
“O-kay, then,” Chase offered. “Well, if there’s nothing else, then-”
At that moment, the bathroom door came flying open. Melanie was standing in the threshold, still dripping wet with water from her bath, not to mention completely naked as well. Before Chase could avert his eyes, she wordlessly marched over to where his bedding and pillow had been laid out on the floor, then threw herself down on them and began to roll around. The bed sheets and pillow were left completely soaking wet in a matter of seconds. Once she was finished with that, Melanie stood up and wordlessly stepped back into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. When she was gone, Chase blinked in surprise, then turned back towards Carmine and Victoria.
“Don’t suppose either of you have a set of spare sheets I could use?”
Carmine threw a pillow at his face. “I’m not usually one to stick up for Melanie, but you deserved that,” she told him.
“I’m inclined to agree,” Victoria offered.
Chase peeled the pillow off his face, then threw it back at Carmine, who caught it. “Oh, so the girls are sticking together on this one, then? And I thought we were all a team.”
“Maybe you should remember this the next time something like it comes up, then,” Carmine said to him.
Melanie stepped out of the bathroom again, this time dressed in her nightclothes. Like Chase, she slept scantily-clad, dressed in little more than her underwear and a see-through silk nightgown. It probably would have actually been a very sexy outfit if it had been literally anyone else, but given that Melanie was a Lich underneath her human-with-a-sickly-pale-complexion appearance and also the fact that Chase didn’t much care for her personality, any kind of titillation her outfit could have offered him was essentially reduced down to nothing.
“Bathroom’s all yours, Carmine,” Melanie announced as she made her way over to the bed she shared with Victoria and took a seat next to her.
Carmine nodded, then headed into the room herself, closing the door behind her. As she did so, a thought occurred to Chase, and he turned towards Melanie.
“Just realized something,” he stated. “When did this whole sexy-outfit-to-bed thing start with you, anyway?”
Melanie blinked, then her eyes narrowed. “You sure you want to go down this road again? Because I can throw your underwear into Carmine’s bathwater right now.”
“I’m not passing judgment, I’m just wondering. I don’t remember you doing this five years ago.”
“Times change, Chase. Maybe I just felt like dressing differently.”
His brow furrowed. “Where did you even get a nightgown and lingerie like that around here, anyway?”
“Why do you care? Looking to get some for yourself?”
He let out a sigh. “Forget I asked, then. Keep your secrets, so long as they don’t risk harming the group.”
Melanie gave him a pointed look, but laid down in bed regardless, pulling the sheets up to cover herself. Chase stared at her for a moment, then shook his head. Melanie was keeping something from the rest of them, and so was Victoria.
Problems within problems, it seemed.
XXX
Name: Chase Ironheart
Level: 9
Race: Human
Class: Warrior
Subclass: Swordmaster
Strength: 20 (MAX)
Dexterity: 15
Intelligence: 10
Wisdom: 13
Constitution: 18
Charisma: 16
Skills: Master Swordsmanship (Level 10); Booby Trap Mastery (Level 8); Archery (Level 4)
Spells: Rush (Level 7); Muscle (Level 4); Stone Flesh (Level 6); Defying The Odds (Level 2)
Traits: Blessed
Name: Carmine Nolastname
Level: 9
Race: Greater Demon
Class: Arcane Witch
Subclass: Archmage
Strength: 10
Dexterity: 13
Intelligence: 19
Wisdom: 19
Constitution: 12
Charisma: 8
Skills: Master Spellcasting (Level 10); Summon Familiar (Level 10)
Spells: Magic Dart (Level 7); Magic Scattershot (Level 5); Fire Magic (Level 5)
Traits: Blessed
Name: Melanie Vhaeries
Level: 9
Race: Ascended Human
Class: Necromancer
Subclass: Arch-Lich
Strength: 8
Dexterity: 13
Intelligence: 18
Wisdom: 16
Constitution: 15
Charisma: 12
Skills: Raise Lesser Undead (Level 10); Raise Greater Undead (Level 3); Unorthodox Weapon User (Level 8)
Spells: Touch of Death (Level 5); Gravesinger (Level 7); Armor of Bone (Level 3)
Traits: None
Name: Victoria Firelight
Level: 10
Race: Human
Class: Paladin
Subclass: Devotee
Strength: 17
Dexterity: 9
Intelligence: 13
Wisdom: 13
Constitution: 19
Charisma: 11
Skills: Swordsmanship Mastery (Level 5); Blunt Weapon Mastery (Level 8); Archery Mastery (Level 5)
Spells: Holy Light (Level 6); Ward of the Gods (Level 5); Bane of the Undead (Level 7); Divine Bolt (Level 4)
Traits: None
