Sixty-nine swans

  In the twelfth year of Han, Liu Bang sat in the Immortal Flower Hall, looking at himself in the mirror, his temples were white with age, his eyes were dim and cloudy, he was already old.

  What have I gained and lost in this life? he asked himself. He had possessed a foundation for all eternity, a picturesque landscape, a beautiful family... Why was it still hard to be at peace when he was old?

  "Your Majesty," said Qi Yi, who had come up behind him, embracing his shoulders and sobbing. Her eyes were shining with tears, soft and delicate, beautiful enough to capture people's hearts.

  Liu Bang kissed her cheek, "Give up, Qi Yi."

  We have been unable to do anything about it.

  How could I not know that Ying'er is a good child? However, Father, people's hearts are inherently biased. In my youth, I was mischievous and always caused trouble for you and Mother. You scolded me and beat me, but in the end, the one who suffered the most was still me.

  In one's life, there are always one or two people who want to give their best to him (her), and the most precious things to him (her). That year, I went to Xianyang and saw the First Emperor's carriage passing in front of me, with a hundred people clearing the way, six horses drawing a canopy, majestic and solemn, with an aura of grandeur all around. "A great man should be like this!" Even small men like Chen Sheng and Wu Guang could shout out "Are kings, nobles, and generals born of noble blood?" What about me, Liu San?

  In the past, Liu San in Fengpu Pavilion became an emperor admired by people all over the world. After becoming an emperor, isn't it just a matter of doing whatever he wants? Qi Yi is so delicate and beautiful, Ruo Yu is so small and pure. I also want to hold them in my hands. I know that Qi Yi is not smart enough, she loves to be willful, she has her own calculations, but what's the difference? As a woman of the emperor, as long as she is beautiful and true, it's okay. I loved the girl from Dingtao who sang "Shang Ling" shyly in the wilderness, wearing the gorgeous clothes I gave her, growing up slowly in the fairyland I built for her, charming and innocent, with elegance in every move.

  The shy and timid girl of the past is gone. In the Han palace, there is an additional Lady Qi. She gave birth to a son for me, and I named him Ruyi. When Ruyi was first born, he was adorable with his tender skin, stumbling and tumbling as he ran over to hug my legs and called out "Daddy" in a milky voice.

  I wish him all the best and may everything go as he wishes.

  Ruyi grew up gradually, with vivid and distinct emotions. Ruyi, what do you want? Ruyi didn't answer. But boys are all about seeking fame and fortune, Father Emperor has a vast empire, willing to leave it to you. Ruyi was very clever, no matter what subject, he would learn quickly, only that he was still young and lacked perseverance; Ruyi didn't know the ways of the world, when throwing tantrums, had even scared several palace staff to death, but boys shouldn't be afraid of bloodshed, right? Father Emperor's vast empire wasn't built by killing his way through it?

  Ying Er, he doesn't resemble me, and actually, he doesn't look like his mother either. I don't know who he looks like after all. His father is unrighteous, his mother has a ruthless heart, yet they've raised such a kind and righteous son.

  What is the use of being kind and righteous? But if Liu Bang was a kind and righteous person, he would have died unnoticed in the chaos of the Qin dynasty. How could he become the emperor of today's world? Among the officials of the imperial court, who is vegetarian? If you don't have any means to control them, how can you hold them down? If we compare the Han Dynasty to a chariot pulled by four horses, the Emperor is the charioteer. I have used all my energy to barely control these proud and fierce horses. If it were up to Empress Lu to drive, wouldn't it be like letting the guest invade the host, causing the chariot to overturn and people to die?

  As time flies, I am slowly getting old. I am delighted to see Ruyi growing up gradually, but I have neglected that Ying'er is also growing up in a place where I haven't seen her.

  The battlefield is the best place to win or lose. It's also the best place for people to grow up. At 16 years old, Ying'er personally asked me to take on the task of leading the army, and after three months, they finally defeated Ying Bu. The sharp sword slightly emerged from its scabbard, and it could no longer hide its edge. The young phoenix stretched its neck and let out a long cry, its voice clear and more powerful than that of an old phoenix.

  Riding a war horse back to Chang'an, Ying'er, I see that you have finally taken on the responsibilities of a man. Why is this? I couldn't understand it no matter how hard I thought about it, but suddenly, in an instant, I slapped my thigh and understood.

  That Yan'er who has always been disliked by me, my impression of him has always remained in the second year of the Han Dynasty.

  That year, Xiahou Yan drove a horse-drawn carriage on the road to escape, with iron cavalry chasing behind, I was flustered and wanted to push Manhua and Ying'er off the carriage.

  Although the son is important, if the old man is gone, what's the point of having a son? Ying Er was clearly frightened, he was held in Man Hua's arms, dazed and at a loss.

  At that time, I was furious. Damn it, I'm your father, and you don't even have the guts to scold me in my face, yet you dare to point at my nose and curse at me?

  Although at that time he would have been annoyed if he had really made a fuss, and even kicked him in the foot, but he couldn't even cry, and his father's heart was secretly suffocating.

  The last pair of children finally returned, and when they faced each other, they were occasionally very polite, but in their hearts, from the beginning, they didn't like him. How he was, in my heart, I couldn't forget the frightened and bewildered eyes on the horse-drawn carriage.

  I don't want to face those eyes.

  As I sit in the tranquil and joyful Longevity Palace, I vaguely hear the sound of golden spears and iron horses that he brought back, and suddenly feel that I am gradually growing old.

  When Ying Er transformed into a man, Ruo Yi was still just a child.

  Ying'er's prestige is increasing daily; how can I fulfill my promise to Qi Yi and swap the position of heir?

  Lü's family did not agree, Liu Hou did not agree, Sun Shu Tong did not agree, Zhou Chang did not agree. Ying'er stood under the temple and looked up at me with his eyes, his gaze told me that he also did not agree.

  In this vast land of Han, apart from you, Zhen, who is held in my palm like a precious treasure, there isn't a single person who would agree with me to depose Ying'er and establish Ruyi instead.

  That day, I held a banquet in the Changle Palace and invited all officials. Yan'er brought someone to the banquet, and I asked him who the four white-haired old men behind him were.

  Ying'er smiled and said, "It's Shangshan Si Hao. Dongyuan Gong..."

  I was shocked and summoned the four of them to ask, "In the past when I rose up, after registering, I sent people to invite the four wise men to come out of the mountain to help me. The four of you all pushed it onto old age and refused to come out of the mountain. How is it that now you are willing to be loyal to the crown prince?"

  Dongyuan Gong Tang Bing's humble and modest nature. "Your Majesty is accustomed to belittling Confucian scholars, while the Crown Prince respects and honors virtuous scholars. Therefore, I will serve the Crown Prince."

  I took a cup of wine and then waved my hand, letting them withdraw.

  Qie Yi noticed my emotions, holding a cup of wine, carefully looking at me. Her hands were slender, her skin was a beautiful honey color. Her hair flowed like clouds, a pair of eyes shone with gentle spring light, rippling with life. I lifted up her hair, pointing to the backs of those four old men and said to her, "Do you see? Those are the wings of the Crown Prince. The Crown Prince's wings have already formed, they are no longer something I can casually shake."

  "It's just four old men." Qi Yi didn't understand. She thought I was joking with her and scolded, "It can't be that serious?"

  "Yes." I sighed, "They are just four old men, but behind these four old men stand the high officials of the imperial court and the hearts of the people of the world."

  Qie Yi knelt on my knees, sobbing and wailing. Her eyes were full of resentment and pity. "Your Majesty is the Emperor, isn't he? Why can't you even decide which son to make the crown prince?"

  "Yes, Qi Yi." I sighed, "I am the Emperor, but even the Emperor cannot do as he pleases. I have established a crown prince, and the officials have chosen their future ruler. And the people of the world have chosen the future emperor." But you and Ruyi are not qualified in their eyes.

  "My dear child," I said with a sigh, "dance for me once more. Come, and I will sing a song for you."

  I'm in high spirits. I personally beat the drum for her and sang loudly:

  "The swan flies high, covering a thousand miles in one move. Its wings are already gone, spanning across the four seas."

  My swan goose.

  The swan is a bird with lofty aspirations, it soars high in the sky all year round and does not get entangled with sparrows.

  "Overawed by the four seas, what can be done? Although there is an increase in taxes, where can they be applied?"

  The song is a Chu song. The sound has the momentum of stopping clouds, coming from the Temple of Gods, and lingering between the sky and the earth.

  Ying'er, he is a swan goose, the son of mine. If I entrust Jiangshan to him, I can look down at the mountains and rivers with the late emperor without shame. But my Qi Yi, my Ruoyi, my concubine Xiaoer, who can I entrust them to?

  Qī Yì danced in the bright and clear song of mine. In this life, I have never seen a more beautiful Qī Jié. On that day, she stood on the Immortal Temple, wearing a dress of emerald green, with a full head of jade hairpins swaying in the wind.

  She is doing a waist fold.

  Have you ever seen a waist fold?

  She swept her long sleeves across her forehead, fluttering like a butterfly in flight, reluctant to settle on the cold branch; her waist, as slender as a willow branch that could be grasped in one hand, swayed gently in the breeze, bending and almost folding in upon itself.

  The hall paved with white jade set off her dance steps, light and agile like a spring mountain. The green butterfly unfolded its wings, one flap, then closed, then another flap, half of her face was fragrant with her red mark, her sorrowful despair and fearful unease, what could not be chased back was the good times of the past.

  I had good times with her.

  Every year at the beginning of the year, in the tenth month of winter, they enter the Lingnu Temple together. They offer sacrifices to the god of music with a pig's head and play music while gazing at each other, blowing flutes and striking zithers, enjoying the joyous atmosphere, singing the "Ling" melody. Then, they join arms and tread on the ground as a festive ritual, singing "The Red Phoenix Arrives", "The Green Paulownia is Ready", will anyone not come? On the seventh day of the seventh month, they gather by the Baizi Pond and have the musicians in the palace play music together at the water's edge. The melody is strange yet gentle, the autumn colors are resplendent, after the music ends, they tie each other with five-colored threads, symbolizing love that lasts for all eternity; on the fourth day of the eighth month, they exit the carved house and gather under the north door to play Go, agreeing that the winner will have good fortune throughout the year, while the loser will be plagued by illness. They take silk threads and pray together under the light of the North Star, praying for heaven's blessing of a long life of one hundred years, free from disaster, disease, and death; on the ninth day of the ninth month, they ascend to a high place on Chongyang Festival, wearing chrysanthemum flowers, eating puffed rice cakes, drinking chrysanthemum wine. On the first day of the first month, at dawn, they go to the poolside to bathe and eat puffed rice cakes to ward off evil spirits, so that there will be no illness throughout the year; on the sixth day of the third month, they set up music by the flowing water, praying for good fortune in the coming year, may every year bring a new year, may every age bring a new age.

  I closed my eyes, unable to bear looking again. The waist was twisted and the beauty was enchanting, but it was full of ominous meaning. I have grown old, and from this ominous witch dance, I have already seen the ending of Qi Ji.

  I don't want to see such an ending.

  The one in front of me is the only woman I have truly doted on in this life.

  I opened my eyes and asked Qi Yi, "Yi'er, are you willing to be buried with me?"

  Qī Yì stared blankly at me, slightly shrinking back.

  She is still so young, but I am already old; she has her beloved son, and I have eight imperial sons; she does not want to die yet, but I have smelled the breath of death.

  I smiled wryly and shook my head.

  Can't protect it anymore.

  I am a silly girl.

  Tears streaming down, begging for pink tickets.

  If there were no pink tickets

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