Chapter 5Waxing and Whining26 January 2022“Girls!” Rose shouts into the room. “You have five minutes to get your asses out of bed and put on some clothes or I will take both of you home before the end of the day!”

  “Oh, like, romantically?” Gwen asks, rolling over under her covers.

  “Like back to whichever of the valleys you came from. Now get out of bed.”

  “At least in Aberdare they would let me sleep in…” She takes a moment to yawn theatrically, letting her disapproval be known as if she isn’t the one whose housing, meals, education and transition are being paid for at the small cost of doing what she’s told.

  Ace sits down on the side of her bed and swipes through her new phone, given to her by Kelynen just after breakfast. Though the phone is rather new, its functionality is severely limited. She is supposed to be gone after all. It would be rather odd if she disappears and then returns to the online world via a new device.

  There’s only a few applications on the phone, and most of those are quite practical. There’s an arm clock, some kind of closed messaging system, which is rather like email – she’s not very computery, so anything with an inbox seems to emute Outlook – alongside what seems to be some kind of consensus client, through which she can only contact the others at the manor and someone called Christine, carefully belled as ‘tech support’ by the application. There’s some kind of e-book library avaible, which cims to hold over a hundred thousand titles. If you need more, it says, annoy tech support.

  Or develop some good taste in sapphic fiction, the next sentence noted.

  “Up, up, up! You’re going to enjoy the mild torture as well, young dy.” Rose calls for Ace, seemingly the st person in the room, and she quickly gets moving, leaving the phone on the small bedside table.

  ***

  “Normally, we’d be leaving this for a few weeks in, but thanks to yesterday’s lovely volunteer work we’ve been forced to move some things forward.”

  Ace, Gwen and Aoife have been made to sit down on the couches in the common room, listening to a short talk by Eira about what is going to happen to them today. Ace already knows their fate for today, and isn’t really excited by the prospect at first – whilst the tter two have only intuited that what is going to happen is actually, genuinely, quite uncomfortable.

  Kelynen is standing behind Ace, looking over her. The feeling is rather odd. It’s not that she is unkind to her. Quite the opposite, actually. But there seems to be some level of detachment in her behaviour. As if she mustn’t get too fond of Ace for one reason or another.

  On the other couch, Gwen and Aoife’s sponsors have taken up simir positions. Rose is standing behind Aoife, Vivi behind Gwen, the tter holding her hands on the shoulders of the girl. Rose sees her looking and quickly points her attention back towards Eira, who is currently expining to the girls how waxing is supposed to work.

  “So, today, we will be waxing the following areas: both legs, both arms and the underarms. If necessary, we will deal with other parts of the body too. It should, in total, probably take around an hour and a half.” Eira points at an image of the female body, adding a rather unneeded expiner to the concept of human body parts. “Afterwards, we expect you to maintain this by waxing every four to six weeks by yourselves. And no: that is not optional.”

  “What if we don’t?” Aoife asks.

  Eira simply stares the girl in the eyes and grins ominously, and that seems to do the job.

  “Oh.” Aoife says.

  “Yes, ma’am.” Gwen says, somehow cowed by Eira where others have failed completely.

  “Now, your respective sponsors will be taking you for treatment one by one – afterwards, at one, we’ll be asking you to start preparing dinner. We’re having guests tonight.”

  “Oh? Who?” Ace asks, curious.

  “Just some old friends. So it doesn’t have to be great, but it has to be decent. They have come from far, after all.”

  Ace wonders why they would put their castle in the middle of rural Wales if they’re going to have people over regurly, before quickly realising that the isotion is the entire point.

  “Um, what should we make?” Ace asks.

  “Kelynen, what will you be helping the girls cook today?”

  “Ooh, I’d love something with baked potatoes. Goes well with the alcohol.”

  “You? I thought we were cooking for others.” Aoife says with only a mildly smug smirk on her face.

  “That’s the benefit of being the cook, you get to decide what you want to make. And the rest just has to go along with it. Fun when you’re the one doing it, reviews are mixed when you’re on the receiving end.” Kelynen says.

  Vivi rolls her eyes when Kelynen says that, looking exasperated. Her cooking skills must be dreadful.

  ***

  “Ow.” Aoife says. “Fucking hell.”

  “Edging hell sounds more fun.” Gwen comments, still ying on her stomach, panties being revealed from under her skirt. She hasn’t tucked properly. Ace feels a little dirty for looking in the first pce, but chances are she’s going to see it within the next 24 hours regardless.

  “Not funny.”

  It was a little funny.

  “Are you going to be miserable all day now?” Gwen rolls her eyes.

  “Yes. My entire body hurts.” Aoife compins, cuddling herself up under the covers. “She used handcuffs, Gwen. And not even in the sexy way.”

  “Hot.”

  “Shut up. The wax was hot. It felt so weird. Like, Rose sat me down, and then she started with my leg, right? Said it’d be easiest. Showed me how to apply it, and then waited, telling me all sorts of things I had done wrong – I need to wake up earlier, I need to put my clothes on properly, I should have helped them prepare breakfast, why don’t I clean up my side of the room, why don’t I listen to Taylor Swift like she told me I should – and then she pulled on the wax, and it hurt. It fucking hurt. So I said we’re not doing it. I’m done. I’m packing my things and going home. That i’d be walking all the way back to Holyhead and getting on the ferry. So Rose, the horrible bitch, she just grabbed some handcuffs, and did it anyway. First behind the back, then above my head for my armpits, and it only hurt more.”

  “I’m telling you. These sponsors? They’re insane. Something is up with them. I don’t know what the fuck I signed up for but it certainly wasn’t this.”

  Gwen stares at Aoife, listening to each and every single one of her words. “Still sounds hot.”

  “Ace. Can you tell Gwen to stop being like this?”

  “Um.” Ace suddenly feels the eyes of both of them on her, but luckily, thankfully, Kelynen is there to save her from an awkward situation.

  “Hi!” She says. “Very sorry for being a bit te. Are ye ready to go?”

  Ace supposes they are as ready as they could be, and nods.

  “Please be cruel.” Gwen says, smirking. “She’s into that.”

  Kelynen looks at Gwen disapprovingly. “Even if she was, that isn’t something you should be teasing her about.”

  “She isn’t?” Aoife whispers to Gwen, just barely audible.

  “If she is, then she’d think being teased for it is fun, actually.” Gwen tries to argue herself out of this situation, somehow, for some reason. “And like, look at her. She’s such a bottom.”

  “Says you.” Ace responds, having to bring up an embarrassing amount of bravery to do so, and now Kelynen looks at her disapprovingly too.

  “Now, now, girls. Let’s not accuse each other of things like that.” The sponsor sounds as tired as Aoife and Gwen probably are, after their 4 hours of sleep.

  “She’s trying to hide a smile.” Gwen whispers to Aoife.

  “That’s because she’s thinking about the hell you’re going to get ter today, bitch. You need your horny little brain fixed. Fuck. That’s a kink too.”

  Gwen smiles at Aoife like she’s won some kind of game, and Kelynen thinks this moment is as good as any to take Ace’s hand and bring her to a bathroom.

  ***

  “We might’ve bitten off more than we can chew with those two.” She says, putting some hot wax on Ace’s left leg. “I know we take the ones who could use a bit more… emotional and personal development, because Ms. Lambert thinks it’s like, hot to take a little shit and turn them into a good girl, but–”

  Wouldn’t that make her a little shit? Ace is rather offended by the notion that she could be anything like those two.

  “I think it’s rather too much sometimes. Like, I’ll admit it, I’m not very good at the whole sponsoring business. I can’t really deal with girls like that. Don’t have the temper for it. That’s why Amy and I chose ye. A bit less… that and more, you know, emotionally underdeveloped in general–”

  Ace bites down on her lip as Kelynen suddenly pulls the wax off her leg.

  Wait, emotionally underdeveloped? Rude.

  “So I can help ye learn the many things I’ve had to get good at myself over the years– ye really don’t think much about girl stuff when ye’re a boy still, in my experience, and suddenly there’s all these things ye need to get good at. Where to even start! It can be quite overwhelming really. And some girls, like ye, already bad at standing up for themselves, just sort of get stuck in a stage of life where they know but can’t really act on it and continue sitting around and waiting around until someone bloody well picks them up and tells them: right, ye’re a girl now, do girl things–”

  Ace has always been rather sensitive, especially to pain. So perhaps her pain scale isn’t quite calibrated to what a normal person would feel. But this hurts. It hurts a lot. Somehow, the second strip is worse than the first, as if Kelynen was holding back.

  “And ye know, it works. It worked on me. An older trans woman found me and took me in and told me that my… what do people call it nowadays. Boymoding? Yes, boymoding. That my boymoding days are over. Wasn’t easy for me, and I don’t think it’s gonna be easy for ye, though ye’ll probably have it easier than I had–” She giggles “–but ye know, at the end of it, ye’re gd someone did it.”

  Another strip, another painful moan barely held back.

  “I did try the little shit approach for a bit. Lasted four months before I had to give up. Couldn’t handle them. They couldn’t handle the others. Nor could they really handle our timeframe. Such a shame – I think they could have made a great girl if they’d just been less… ye know. I don’t know how they are doing right now.”

  She certainly can imagine.

  “So, I tried again the next year, this time with Eira and Vivi and Rose and the support of Elle. Picked up Amy. She was such a shy little girl back then. Absolutely adorable. Afraid to transition. Thought she’d feel worse after. Would rather stay a boy than be a non-passing girl. I know, I know, it seems silly nowadays. I sometimes forget that she used to be a boy. Anyhow–”

  Ace moans in pain, and she really needs a break. But she must be strong. For her sake. If she gives up half-way through, she’ll only feel worse for it.

  “She really needed a wake-up call. Someone to guide her. I think– I think she saw that in ye too. Too many trans girls like that out in the world, not enough women willing to help them out – despite our best efforts, might I add – and it’s just so heartbreaking. And I can just help one girl at a time. It’s a whole lot of work.”

  She sighs. “I love my job. I really do. Even if I have to put up with little shits for a while. They’ll end up alright. I know that. Seen much worse turned into beautiful, vibrant young women. Those two will be alright. Ye’ll be alright. There are so many great trans girls out there in the world, the ones who needed our help. They’re doing amazing things. One of the ones I lived with works for the BBC now, one of ours actually. I think she helps produce, what’s it called– I don’t remember, something sciencey, at least. It’s really cool.”

  This final strip for her lower leg does prove to be the breaking point for Ace. In pain, desperate, she feels like she has to plead.

  “Um. Could we have a little– br-break?” She asks. Very smooth, Ace. Good job.

  “Oh! I’m sorry, I must have been yapping on a bit too much.” Kelynen shakes her head. “I should have asked you whether you were alright to continue. And something else. Forgot what.”

  And in the few moments of silence that follow Ace yet again questions why she has gotten herself involved in all this.

  ***

  Aoife was overstating things quite a bit, in the end. Yes, it hurts, and it hurts especially when, as Kelynen did, you sometimes have to go over the same part of the skin twice to get some extra hairs that didn’t get removed the first time around but it dissipates rather quickly if you don’t touch it, and let the skin recover naturally. Which is what Ace is going to do: no leggings, just bare arms and legs, and y down somewhere with a book and maybe some nice, rexing music.

  Quite the expectation has been set though – she’s going to become a woman in the way they want her to be a woman whether she likes it or not. That is, after all, what she’s signed up for. It’s been twenty-four hours and they’re already getting her to wear feminine clothes, even if they’re a little kinky, and they’ve managed to get her to start dehairing in the parts they would want her to.

  Perhaps there is a method to the madness.

  Gwen returns from her own torments, uncharacteristically silent, dropping herself down on the bed and wallowing in what Ace assumes is pain. Perhaps those two have had their hair pulled extra painfully, or something.

  Aoife, feeling brave, decides to do the obvious despite Gwen’s state.

  “So, was it hot?” The girl asks.

  “Fuck you.” Gwen mumbles into the covers of her bed. “My balls hurt.”

  Oh, that would expin why those two are in the state they are in. Ace is rather happy she’s kept up with that mess of hair growth much more intensively than others. Kelynen said she should do it herself in a week or two, when it’s more grown out.

  “Good.” Aoife says.

  The room is silent for a few minutes after. Ace is rather amazed by this. She was assuming that the trick would be to find some kind of gag for those two girls.

  Apparently the answer was ball torture.

  Good to know?

  ***

  “I can’t believe this is edible.” Aoife whispers, sitting on the floor in front of her bed with a pte on her p. “I could swear I had fucked it up horrifically.”

  “I can’t believe they made us eat here.” Gwen sighs.

  Ace certainly can understand why they did. She was sent down to the celr to pick up, according to Kelynen, at least a dozen bottles of wine, two bottles of vodka, a bottle of rum, and some whisky. It took her a few trips to get everything the girls needed, and even then she isn’t sure if she managed to finish the list.

  “So. Ace.” Aoife breaks the silence. “I don’t think you ever told us anything about yourself.”

  “Um.” Ace thinks about the million ways to answer that question. “I’m from Leeds, I guess.”

  “Could hear that.” Gwen mumbles, a bite of potato in her mouth.

  “It’s not that bad.” Ace pouts.

  “Eyup, that were a right good shag, love.” Gwen horrifically butchers a generic TV Yorkshire accent. “You speak like that.”

  “Why is she back to the shagging.” Aoife rolls her eyes. “Talk about one-note.”

  “Because every time I talk about my hobbies you get all annoying about them.” Gwen raises her voice. “And because Ace here, I don’t know what she does. Sit around and read on her bed. Listen to us talk. So what the fuck else am I going to talk about. At least I know talking about sex annoys you as much as you annoy me when I want to talk about my favourite anime.”

  Ace sits back and listens to the two bicker again, clearly having forgotten the purpose of asking her about her life so they have more things to discuss is to let her talk. So she puts her pte down on the floor, stands up, and leaves the room .

  Gwen and Aoife are left mildly stunned in the room behind her, but she doesn’t care. She knows who she’d much rather be with today.

  She knocks on Amy’s door to no response, so she tries knocking again, assuming the girl is listening to some of her louder music preferences and thus can’t hear Ace’s approach.

  Still no response.

  Ace tries the door, softly, remembering that she said it was always okay for her to visit, but she finds that the door is locked.

  She must be at the dinner, then.

  Ace, feeling too annoyed to return to the rest, decides to sit down somewhere in the common room instead, closing her eyes, dozing away.

  ***

  Ace isn’t sure how long she slept, or if she slept at all, because she hears some kind of noise. It sounds like a dozen electronic locks all cycling at once. The lights have gone out, so she tries to turn on a mp near the couch she is sitting at, and finds that it doesn’t turn on either.

  As if her luck couldn’t get worse. Now she’s outside her room, in the middle of night, in a manor without electricity. Maybe she should try to find someone?

  Ace walks through the hallways, trying a door or two as she does: the sound of the doors cycling definitely was them locking. Probably some kind of automatic security system. If the electricity goes out: lock all doors. They are, she supposes, kind of prisoner to the manor.

  A missing person, someone who shouldn’t stop being missing. If they knew where she was, they’d shut down the facility, after all.

  And just when she is about to get genuinely frustrated about the fact that she is locked out of her room and isn’t able to at least, like, pick up some books to read here in the common room, someone pces a hand over her mouth, pulls an arm around her stomach, and whispers into her ear.

  “You’re not supposed to be out this evening, are you? Luckily, we know just the solution for that.”

  The solution, it seems, is a kiss on the cheek. From an anonymous girl in a long, mystical-seeming robe.

  As if this pce couldn’t get any weirder.