Honestly, I don’t know why or how I got myself in this absolute shit show. Like I wasn’t meant to be here, but no that stupid God still had to put me through this mess, didn’t he? Well, you’re probably wondering what I am yapping about I must sound like a crazed lunatic, just like the ones from your home, town you know the one that was always seen either drinking talking to himself, or even both. Right, you wanted to know why I’m compining like this well, it started back when I was at home.

  The night was like any other; I was alone in my room, which honestly resembled a dump. My depression had got the better of me, and it was a complete mess: rubbish everywhere, dirty clothes piled up, and cups with half-finished tea or coffee still in them. I knew I should have cleaned up, but I didn't see the point. It felt almost like I was subconsciously punishing myself. I wouldn’t do anything stupid; I didn’t want to hurt the people who still looked at me with kind eyes, those who saw me without contempt or pity like I was some kind of waste of space. So, I just hid my sorrows and pain, keeping it all inside to avoid hurting anyone but myself—that was all I felt I was worth.

  The night was like any other; I was alone in my room, which honestly resembled a dump. My depression had gotten the better of me, and it was a complete mess: rubbish everywhere, dirty clothes piled up, and cups with half-finished tea or coffee still in them. I knew I should have cleaned up, but I didn't see the point. It felt almost like I was subconsciously punishing myself. I wouldn’t do anything stupid; I didn’t want to hurt the people who still looked at me with kind eyes, those who saw me without contempt or pity like I was some kind of waste of space. So, I just hid my sorrows and pain, keeping it all inside to avoid hurting anyone but myself—that was all I felt I was worth.

  Like most nights, I couldn’t sleep. I y staring up at the ceiling, focusing on those white square panels while shameful memories fshed through my mind. It felt like my mind was taunting me, reminding me that I was stuck in this pce, my very own prison created by myself. That night was honestly getting to me, so I decided to take a walk to clear my head of these thoughts, as I had done on other nights. I got out of the messy nest I called my bed, filled with old clothes, trash, crisp packets, empty cans of various drinks, and old, nasty ptes. Any depiction of a gross room would have been fitting for my so-called bedroom.

  As I got ready, I did not bother changing out of the shorts I had been wearing for the past few days—already starting to smell of residual body sweat. Instead, I just put on a pair of jeans over them and grabbed a random jacket that was lying around. Honestly, I had given up on caring about how I presented myself at all. I put on old, worn shoes that were way past their due date and should have been repced ages ago, but that did not bother me.

  Leaving my apartment, I started walking through the town. It was already dark, with only a few 24-hour stores still open, their bright neon signs lighting up the streets along with the flickering, dull orange streetlights. I checked my phone; there were no notifications, but the time was 23:45 on Saturday, April 29, 2025. Another Saturday was wasted alone, with no pns or friends to spend it with. Trying to distract myself, I looked around. Surprisingly, the town was busy. The takeaway was still open, packed with people who had been drinking and were calling it a night with a well-earned greasy kebab.

  I kept walking, casually passing a group of drunk friends and feeling a tinge of jealousy. I looked down, quickening my pace like a crazed lunatic rushing for their next fix. I wanted to ignore my fragile emotions. Past the strip, I reached the ke. It wasn’t deep—around six feet—so it wouldn’t go past my head, but it was dark and didn’t have many streetlights. The area was normally quiet and peaceful, making it the perfect pce to clear my head.

  As I approached the ke, the surroundings were calm, with only the occasional bird song from nearby nesting birds. I crossed the bridge to the other side, which was empty of anyone who might distract me— or so I thought. To my surprise, there were three people ahead of me: one girl who seemed far too drunk to be there, and two males who appeared to be a year or two younger than me. One thing stood out: they seemed rather pushy as if they were trying to lure the girl somewhere.

  At first, I thought I was overreacting, letting my pessimism get the best of me. But as I got closer and was about to pass them, I heard one of them say, “Hey, keep her quiet. Someone’s walking past; act normal.” Hearing this struck me; I don't know if it was bravery to do something good or stupidity for not minding my own business. I called out, “You okay there?” One of the men replied, “What are you talking about? Yeah, we’re fine; mind your own business, man.” It didn’t seem right to me. I hadn’t noticed the other man taking something out of his pocket. Maybe it was the darkness or the fact that I was focused on the woman, who looked like she didn’t know where she was or who she was with. We’ve all been that drunk before, either alone or with others. But that didn’t matter; I spoke up again, “I wasn’t asking you, d. I…”

  Like most nights, I couldn’t sleep. I y staring up at the ceiling, focusing on those white square panels while shameful memories fshed through my mind. It felt like my mind was taunting me, reminding me that I was stuck in this pce, my very own prison created by myself. That night was honestly getting to me, so I decided to take a walk to clear my head of these thoughts, as I had done on other nights. I got out of the messy nest I called bed, filled with old clothes, trash, crisp packets, empty cans of various drinks, and old, nasty ptes. Any depiction of a gross room would have been fitting for my so-called bedroom.

  As I got ready, I didn’t bother changing out of the shorts I had been wearing for the past few days—already starting to smell of residual body sweat. Instead, I just put on a pair of jeans over them and grabbed a random jacket that was lying around. Honestly, I had given up on caring about how I presented myself at all. I put on old, worn shoes that were way past their due date and should have been repced ages ago, but that didn’t bother me.

  Leaving my apartment, I started walking through the town. It was already dark, with only a few 24-hour stores still open, their bright neon signs lighting up the streets along with the flickering, dull orange streetlights. I checked my phone; there were no notifications, but the time was 23:45 on Saturday, April 29, 2025. Another Saturday was wasted alone, with no pns or friends to spend it with. Trying to distract myself, I looked around. Surprisingly, the town was busy. The takeaway was still open, packed with people who had been drinking and were calling it a night with a well-earned greasy kebab.

  I kept walking, casually passing a group of drunk friends and feeling a tinge of jealousy. I looked down, quickening my pace like a crazed lunatic rushing for their next fix. I wanted to ignore my fragile emotions. Past the strip, I reached the ke. It wasn’t deep—around six feet—so it wouldn’t go past my head, but it was dark and didn’t have many streetlights. The area was normally quiet and peaceful, making it the perfect pce to clear my head.

  As I approached the ke, the surroundings were calm, with only the occasional bird song from nearby nesting birds. I crossed the bridge to the other side, which was empty of anyone who might distract me— or so I thought. To my surprise, there were three people ahead of me: one girl who seemed far too drunk to be there, and two males who appeared to be a year or two younger than me. One thing stood out: they seemed rather pushy as if they were trying to lure the girl somewhere.

  At first, I thought I was overreacting, letting my pessimism get the best of me. But as I got closer and was about to pass them, I heard one of them say, “Hey, keep her quiet. Someone’s walking past; act normal.” Hearing this struck me; I don't know if it was bravery to do something good or stupidity for not minding my own business. I called out, “You okay there?” One of the men replied, “What are you talking about? Yeah, we’re fine; mind your own business, man.” It didn’t seem right to me. I hadn’t noticed the other man taking something out of his pocket. Maybe it was the darkness or the fact that I was focused on the woman, who looked like she didn’t know where she was or who she was with. We’ve all been that drunk before, either alone or with others. But that didn’t matter; I spoke up again, “I wasn’t asking you, d. I…”

  My eyes closed and everything was dark I thought it would be all over now I wouldn’t have to struggle anymore that was a stupid thought I was in that darkness for what felt like an eternity. Every part of my life fshed before me at that time. Some were kind and memories that I was fond of. These made me realize that not all of this life was sad and shameful. On the other hand, a lot more were the every negative memory that got me in this mental shithole. Every single mess-up mistake or blunder that had happened before this moment pyed out in front of me like some sort of dark spstick comedy film. Not some famous ones but just a few movies that had no fanbase whatsoever. I had accepted that this was the end. In my st fleeting thoughts what my grandma used to babble about every Sunday before church came to my head. Almost like the creators sniggering pointing out that they did try and warn me but I still lead my life in this manner. Memories of my grandma yapping her heart away to me come to the forefront of my mind. “ Your life is your own you have free will to do what you want but your choices will reflect where you go after you pass this world. Heaven for those who do good. Purgatory for those who don’t decide and waste their life. Finally Hell for those who commit sins and wrong their fellow neighbours”. I had always thought she was just a crazy old religious fanatic but she seemed to be correct as it seems I’m stuck in purgatory pretty fitting for my wasteful life.

  “Oi do you want to open your eyes I don’t have all day I’m pretty busy you know” To say I was shocked would be an understatement opening my eyes they hurt at first due to the bright lights after a few seconds of them adjusting I got a good look around and one thing was for sure I wasn’t back where I had been stabbed. Instead, I was back in my room but with a lot of clear differences. The room was neat and tidy the clothes all folded and put away in their respective spots. The once trash-filled floors were clean and clean. This was my room but not mine at the same time. It was far too well kept to be the room where I wasted my time in this life. I was in my bed which was far too clean and well-kept well off and out of pce. As I looked up I noticed someone else sitting in my desk chair. Before I even comprehend I scream out. “WTF where am I and who are you”. Losing all rational thinking I mean who wouldn’t I thought I was dead before I could scream more questions my voice was gone like I had been muted the way you would on your TV or a video you watched on a certain website. “right now that you can't talk any more just listen don’t bother to shout anymore I made it so you can't talk anymore okay now listen” this man in front of me was a tall slender androgynous looking man I think with long pure white hair and what most people would think they look beautiful and graceful to me he just looked stuck up and snobby. “ you can think of me however you want it doesn’t matter to me”. I was shocked that he knew that I was speaking badly of him but before that train of thought could continue the man continued speaking. “So listen up I don’t have long. You died and honestly, your life was shit, but you had so much potential. What went wrong? Honestly, I'm just disappointed I had hopes for you. Lucky you that you showed that you had some spine back then with those two mugs. So long story short I’m giving you another chance. It will be nothing like the world you are used to. Lucky for you I will give you a few perks. Aren't I nice? These perks will make your time getting adapted there a little easier. I mean only a little easier. So nothing game-breaking.” “What the hell is going on am have I gone insane? After I died I don’t get this at all.” I couldn’t wrap my head around this but that didn’t stop the snobby-looking person in front of me. “Right enough of the expnation my times nearly up. So it's time for you to go, good luck you will need it". As the st word left his mouth my vision turned blinding white and what again felt like an eternity with sensations that I was being sucked towards something at breakneck speeds zooming through what felt like the whole known universe. Hearing all sorts of sounds what I could only describe as emotions. Any emotions you could think of I could hear and feel them as I travel through this unknown space. Rage hearing people fight, shout, and scream for all sorts of wrongdoings. Happiness ughter cheering and plenty of great news. Hearing this I had a strong pulling pain in my chest I subconsciously grabbed my heart. Looking down I still saw the very bde that had brought my demise still inside my chest. The final emotion I felt was sorrow and this was the strongest one. It was filled with regret for not doing more, of being incompetent when everything was set out for you, and self-loathing that they weren't good enough. These were the very same emotions I had been battling for the pitiful 23 years that I had put up with. The emotions and the sensation of rushing through time and space ended. All I was left with was the sensation of wind on my face. The heat hit my face. Even the smell that I was used to was gone left with a fresh and pure smell reminding me of my grandma's farm in a lot simpler times. I pulled myself together I opened my eyes I was in a completely different pce. Trees as tall as two or three-story buildings sprawled all across my view. A clearing was right around me with what looked like a crater impact. Some animals hiding in the bushes inspecting this strange sight, it was strange that they weren't running away. But one thing was for sure the strangest thing of it all. There were two suns in the sky in front of me. One was a bright orange and rge roughly twice the size the sun was on the earth and the other one was a dull pastoral teal about a quarter smaller than the first one. I wasn’t able to take all this in. Or even start to comprehend it. So the only thing that any sane person would do I scream.

  “where the fuck am I !!!”