As we walked and Fraya kept up her bombardment of questions to Tyler, I saw Xyke constantly glancing at her.

  Not in an annoyed way but... like he was paying more attention to her.

  'Does he..? Oh he's definitely crushing.' I smirked at him, and even though he couldn't see my face through the visor, he probably sensed it as he snapped toward me.

  "What? What is it?" Xyke asked, looking nervous.

  "Oh, you know. Nothing at all. It's fine." I chuckled as Xyke frowned down at me.

  "It's obviously something, just tell me." He was getting annoyed now.

  "Fine, lean down here." I beckoned him closer, conspiratorially.

  "You have a crush on Fraya don't you?" I whispered and he looked shocked.

  "It's not a crush if I love her." Xyke whispered back, trying to act all strong and confident.

  "Oh you love her huh? Well, then maybe you should ask her on a date then." I teased him and he slumped his shoulders as his face got just a tad darker. He couldn't quite blush, but it was the closest thing his species had.

  "I mean, I planned on it but..." He fidgeted.

  "You could ask her now? This might be a good time to actually. I'll be your wingman!" I bopped him on his arm and he half glared at me.

  "Do you even know how to be a wingman?" He asked incredulously.

  "No. I'll just support you from the shadows. I can take Tyler or leave him with you while I go play an arcade game or something." I offered and he considered it.

  "You think I have an actual shot?" He asked fidgeting more before straightening out and acting normal as Fraya looked back for a second.

  "Definitely." I said with confidence, but I had no fucking clue if he did or not.

  Xyke sighed as she looked back at Tyler, somehow having even more questions.

  "I don't know..." Xyke was acting like a teenager with his first love.

  "Xyke, I don't know how long your species lives for or what your mating rituals are like, but I do know that if you wait too long you'll lose any chance you have." I was pulling advice from some random romance movies and anime I had seen and barely remembered. Splicing it with random bullshit, since none of them were about aliens.

  He looked at me weird before sighing again.

  "I know... It's just... I really like her." He rubbed his big grey head with his hands.

  "That's why you should just go for it. Take her on a date and see if any sparks fly." I was once again pulling from my half baked movie knowledge. but it's cliche because it works right?

  "Now? What if she says no and then it's super awkward?" Xyke was looking for excuses to run away, but I wasn't going to allow that.

  "You leave me no choice." I said, dramatically dark.

  Then skipped my happy ass towards Fraya and Tyler.

  "Hey Fraya? What do you think about going to an amusement park while we're here?" I smiled evilly as I felt the horror leaking from Xyke.

  "An amusement park? I'd love to! As long as Xyke wants to go?" She asked, looking back at him.

  I looked back too and he was acting way too normal.

  "Uh, yeah, sure." He nodded and Fraya beamed.

  'Oh my god... I'm the best wingman this universe has ever laid eyes upon.' I had the feeling Fraya shared Xykes feelings. She might even know and has just been waiting for him. 'How juicy this is!'

  I wasn't one for romance movies or the like, but it is so much different when it's happening in front of you. This felt like one of those shitty anime filler episodes, and I was digging it.

  "There are several parks for amusement on the stations, what did you have in mind Young Master?" Tyler asked me, a slight glint in his eye.

  'It's so obvious even Tyler knows about it!'

  "Hmmm, are there any with adrenaline rides or maybe just the most popular for 'tourists'?" I asked and Tyler caught onto what I was saying.

  "I have just the place in mind." Tyler smiled.

  I grinned even more devilishly as we followed Tyler.

  I was feeding off of Xykes nervousness like a demon consuming fear and helplessness, chuckling to myself all the while.

  ...

  It has been several hours, and I've spent most of it spying on the budding couple... along with Tyler.

  Tyler and I had wandered off as soon as we entered the park, leaving the 2 love birds alone.

  The whole experience was... aggravating.

  'Have you ever seen a romance anime, strange spectator I sometimes talk to in my mind? It's just like that.' I mentally spoke to myself like a streamer or sports reporter.

  'Xyke, pure innocent Xyke, is a fucking moron. He's as dense as the metal he likes to work with. Fraya has been practically beating him over the head with a bat, trying to get him to notice. He was just too nervous to.'

  "I must say, this is the most profitable and the most entertaining job I've ever had." Tyler the alien butler said, literally eating this universes equivalent of popcorn while looking through one of those fancy binoculars on a stick.

  Where he got it, I have no idea. The "popcorn" was pink, and perfectly spherical. It was tasty too, since it tasted just like it.

  "When do you think he'll notice? Or do you think it'll take Fraya making the first move?" I asked as I drove the bumper car.

  The ride was something similar to our bumper cars back on Earth, but it was in a 3D space. Allowing movement on the Z axis, which is altitude. It was also safer, somehow. Magic.

  "Hmmm... Now that is the question, isn't it Young Master? I wonder indeed." Tyler stroked his mustache while he pondered. His bucket of pink orbs left alone on his lap for now.

  I expertly dodged another car as they tried to attack us. I probably looked like an idiot, suspicious, or just really bad at the game because I was avoiding everyone else as I stayed closest to the wall where we could see the couple.

  "This is so boring... Please do something else." Jerald spoke up, once again it had been awhile since I had heard from him.

  I ignored the loveless fool in my mind and kept the car relatively steady for Tylers observations.

  "My~! How daring of Lady Fraya! She's grasped him by the arm now, dragging him along to... Blasted! They're out of my sight. Young Master, let us get off this ride, post haste." Tyler said and I purposefully let us get hit, striking us out of the game.

  Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

  It was a sort of battle royal, but more... organized I suppose. Not the horrible free for all our bumper cars is, but not that different. It was hard to describe. It was of alien design after all, and I never bothered to learn the rules.

  Once we were forced to land we hopped out and scurried away, off to find our targets. I couldn't just fly us around to look for them either, since that would be suspicious and it's against the rules. I had brought it up to Tyler and he shot it down while explaining that the "air space" is heavily restricted. Probably something to do with the lines or some other reason.

  When we finally saw them, they had entered one of the longest rides this place had to offer. Which also had the longest lines but I had bought us the most expensive VVIP tickets, which let us skip the lines entirely. Even the lines for VIP's. It just cost me 100k per ticket... Worth it!

  But alas, we just missed the ride and could not follow them. It was one of those lovey-dovey slow boat rides through a tunnel. Looking at the line, it was all couples.

  "There's no way we could have gotten onto that anyway." I said, pointing out the line to Tyler.

  "Indeed. There is also no possible way Sir Xyke hasn't realized Fraya's intentions by this point." Tyler munched on some of his orbs, his fancy binoculars once again disappearing somewhere.

  "I don't know, he's pretty dense. he might reason it out to be some kind of mistake rather than a hidden confession." I rubbed my helmets chin, pondering.

  "Let us hope not. This ride is famous for couples, and it's also infamous for it's long ride time." Tyler said ominously.

  "Infamous? Why?"

  "Well, not everyone who comes to ride end up as couples. So there are stories of very long awkward silences while the failed date is forced to continue for 40+ minutes." Tyler shuddered slightly.

  "Oh. Yikes." I flinched at the thought.

  "So we'll have to wait for like an hour before we see them again? And by then it'll either be a success or failure?" I asked, slightly disappointed we won't get to see the finale.

  "Indeed. Shall we go do something else? Perhaps ride a contraption for real instead of using it for reconnaissance?" Tyler asked and I nodded.

  "Might as well. Any ideas on how to best waste an hour?" Tyler nodded and I followed along.

  "Should we stop somewhere to eat Young Master? You haven't eaten anything all day." Tyler brought it up as we walked, and he was right.

  By this point, I had hired Tyler for 6 hours. An excellent day for him, as he didn't have to worry about not being paid since it automatically went into his account when an hour passed. He also knew for a fact that I had not eaten.

  "Maybe? I don't really eat anymore, but it might be a good idea." I said and Tyler changed course slightly.

  We headed towards a popular looking restaurant I didn't bother learning the name of and he didn't ask about me not eating anymore. Probably because he didn't know anything about my species. No one did.

  Once again we skipped the massive line, our Adamantium colored badges around our necks showing that we could, and I let him order our food.

  "Do you have any preferences, Young Master?" He asked and I shook my head.

  "Not really, though I suppose nothing still alive or unprocessed." I offered and he nodded.

  I had seen some of the popular things aliens ate, and nauseating was barely enough of a word to describe some of the dishes. Thankfully, being an omnivore wasn't too rare in this universe so getting food wasn't an issue.

  Tyler found us a table in the VVIP section upstairs, and we sat down. I stared at the food in front of me, frowning.

  "Is something wrong Young Master?" Tyler asked, one of his brows raising.

  "Not really. It's just... This is a kids meal." I said flatly, staring at the obviously cartoonish tray. It even came with a toy.

  "Shall I return it and get you something else?" Tyler asked, preparing to stand but I waved my hand.

  "No, no. I just forget that everyone thinks of me as a kid sometimes. I'll eat it." I didn't want to make a scene after all.

  I went to twist my helmet off, but Jimmy sensed what I wanted to do and the helmet merely morphed down like a liquid. Returning into the suit and vanishing. Tyler looked very surprised. Well as surprised as his etiquette let him.

  "You look unkempt Young Master, is this your species normal grooming standards for one of your caliber?" Tyler was not surprised about Jimmy, but about my appearance.

  "Ah, uh, not really. I keep forgetting to shave and do... anything with my appearance." I felt slightly embarrassed, but I didn't care all that much.

  "Unacceptable Young Master. We will have to fix this after we eat." He gave a stern nod and began eating.

  I wanted to sigh but I really needed to clean up. The last time I looked at myself, I was a mess. Long nails, hair, and patchy facial hair too. I started eating my alien version of a happy meal, because let's be honest that's exactly what it was.

  I was pleasantly surprised by the taste though, it must be one of those fancy versions that rich people get for their kids. Looking at the toy again, it was pretty high quality. I took it out of it's little bag and started looking at it better.

  'Is this... No way!' I guffawed as I turned it on and the little android did a flip out of my hands. It was a little humanoid robot, except the head was just a singular tiny circular camera. It's hands had 3 fingers, and it's feet didn't have any toes but it did have articulation that mimicked toes. It looked up at me expectantly, so I gave it a little order.

  "Do a handstand." I said and it did it.

  'Holy hell this thing kicks ass!'

  "Stop playing with your toy and eat your food Young Master Azurath." Tyler spoke like a parent using their child's full name.

  "Okay." I sighed as I kept eating, watching my slick as fuck toy walk around on it's hands.

  The meal was good, but I couldn't shake the feeling I was eating the alien version of chicken nuggets or chicken tenders with mac and cheese. Not that it was a bad thing, since I'd kill for either but it made me feel like a kid. Not in a good way either.

  'Maybe I should just kill a bunch of monsters. Reach level 35 so people stop treating me like a child.'

  But if I did, I'd lose my advantage for letting the System create Skills for me to buy from my actions and how others perceive me.

  'I should start gaslighting again...' Even though I didn't want to, it seemed to be working when I used it on Keiji.

  Once we were done eating, I let my helmet reform around my head and put my new bud John Johnson in my pocket. I'll tell him his new name later, when I'm not around Tyler or anyone else. I get enough shit for naming my drones.

  Tyler immediately took me to a 'Grooming Station' in the park, which is the weirdest fucking thing I've seen today. A hair and beauty salon. In an amusement park. Unbelievable.

  It looked like a typical place you'd get a haircut. Big chairs all lined up with people trained in cutting hair or whatever you needed. Though, these chairs had privacy screens for some odd reason.

  Tyler flashed someone his VVIP card and we were immediately taken to a private section. These booths were even more private, since they were in their own separate rooms. 'Talk about overkill.'

  "So, what are we doing today~?" A super friendly Hair Dresser or Beautician met us in one of these private booths.

  He, she, someone of some kind of gender was very flashily dressed. The person sparkled, and it wasn't just their clothes. Their skin looked like glittery glass, and their large eyes looked like gemstones. For all I knew, this was some kind of living crystal.

  "Young Master Azurath needs to be groomed and tidied up." Tyler spoke, then nudged me. Silently telling me to lower my helmet.

  With a sigh, I 'told' Jimmy to let it down and the crystalian thing dramatically gasped.

  "My~! Whatever shall we do with you? My goodness." They fussed over my face and hair, touching and prodding my scalp.

  I remained still, dread building up with how terrible this might turn out.

  ...

  Greeze, the crystal thing, turned out to be very good at their job.

  They wouldn't stop talking about how my eyes were a pretty color, and how rare it was for species to evolve vibrant colors in their eyes.

  Thinking about it, most of the species I met did have black eyes with different colored sclera's. Which is the white part of our eyes. Some had yellow, some black, pretty much any color you can consider secondary.

  My neck and face was shaved, but the sideburns remained. Just perfectly straight lines of hair going all the way down to my jawline, making my face look rectangular. My sprouting monobrow went from caveman to civilized Englishman, and my hair was cut to a reasonable length. My hair wasn't stylized sense the creature didn't know what was popular for my species, but I thought it looked nice. My nails were also trimmed, which didn't take long at all.

  I was worried that my EA skill would make my nails impossible to cut, but thankfully it recognized the trimming as not an attack but health care. 'I wonder if it'll recognize surgery as something helpful too...'

  "Not bad. I like it." I said with a nod.

  Don't get me wrong, it looked weird as fuck compared to what you'd find on Earth, but this wasn't Earth so it get's a pass.

  "Passable." Tyler responded, pondering it.

  "Excellent~! Thank you for stopping by." The crystal waved then left.

  "Don't we owe them money?" I asked, raising my now perfect eyebrows.

  "It's free with the pass Young Master." Tyler answered.

  "Convenient." I nodded in appreciation.

  "Very." Tyler added while leading me back out of the building.

  I had my helmet reform as we walked out. I still didn't quite like walking around without it.

  I could tolerate it, but I didn't like how... exposed it made me feel. I felt like I should be hiding when not wearing it. Like I was naked.

  "Must you wear your helmet Young Master? Should you not let others bask in your presence?" Tyler asked and I could tell he was both teasing me and being genuine.

  "If you have to know, I don't feel comfortable without it. It's not a fear and I don't get all panicky without it, I just dislike not having it on. I can't describe it properly." I sighed as we left the building.

  "Hmm, very well." Tyler lead me to some ride, like we had originally planned.

  The park was built to mimic a planets surface, a false sky with clouds and a sun. But if you looked really hard, you could see the seams of the megastructure. The clouds were real, so it was very convincing. Pretty too.

  We rode a few strange rides, some on rails like roller coasters but clearly not as dangerous as what we had on Earth. Or maybe I was just growing more and more apathetic to danger. Likely the latter. Other rides were so alien in nature I couldn't even use them, as they were not built for my physiology. My body was simply incompatible.

  All in all, it was a nice day. No danger, no Dungeon delving for loot, no monsters.

  Just some friends and a butler taking a vacation day.

  Get fooled by the jester! That aint happenin'! Not for a while probably.