Fuck the holidays. I’d been wandering around the city, looking in at all the houses, seeing the happy faces of the families. My family had never been one for g about my needs. They refused to listen to me when I told them I o move somewhere else for my own sanity. When I asked if we all could so I wouldn’t be separated from them, I was given a pained look, but was ultimately told “no.”

  I raised the bottle to my lips again, having lost t of how much sake I had drank. Nothi my lips, cracked as they were in the cold. Frustrated, I tossed the bottle away only for it to shatter in an alley. I didn’t care, the holidays had always been a time when I felt more depressed than usual, and not having ao celebrate it with hurt so much more than I was willing to tell anyone.

  As I tinued walking, I got more angry and the sake started effeg me more and more. I started stumbling and tripped over a piece of the sidewalk the city had yet to fix. My kook the brunt of my fall, getting scraped on my jeans and I hissed in pain. I started cussing as I y there, uo really move, despising the very cept of family and holidays. “Freya?” a voice called out, worriedly. “Freya, is that you? What have you doo yourself?” I turo the sourd saw an older woman, maybe as old as my mom, getting out of a minivan. She had on a fashionable coat over her dress and it was clear she didn’t mean to go out.

  “Who are you? How do you know my name?” I gred at her. I wasn’t having aake pity on me now. Not after the shitty Christmas I’d been having. Especially not after basically be disowned by my parents who refuse to e visit me.

  The woman only gave me a sad smile. “I’m an old friend of your parent’s, actually. Name’s Naomi. Now e o’s get you somewhere warm, loved, and ed up.” She reached a hand down to help me stand. “I’ve been looking all over for you since you weren’t at your apartment. Your parents wa to be a surprise, but I guess they should’ve told you in advance.”

  That… that ’t be right. My parents actually cared?!? Then why the fuck aren’t they here on fug CHRISTMAS??? But… they sent this… Naomi? “I… I o cheething real quick.” I fumbled around t my rear pocket off of the ground so I could grab my pho of it and quickly shot off a text to my mom. “Hey, there’s this crazy woman g to know you. Name’s Naomi. You know her?”

  My mom replied almost instantly, “Of course, she helped me out of a bind a long time ago and helped me gain the fideo ask your mother out. I asked her to make sure you were fioday, since I know how you get on holidays. Love you! Your mother and I are so proud of you for doing what you o make yourself happy!” I started bawling as I read her text. Words I didn’t know I o hear, suddenly ing from someohought wasn’t going to be there for me.

  This is too muOW they want to be there for me? Fug ribsp;“Sorry, dy, but I don’t need your help.” I tried to stand but the alcohol had well and truly set in by now, causio nearly fat before Naomi caught me. The impact of it knocked my breath out in a wheeze that almost sounded sickly to me.

  Naomi sighed, “Look, Freya, I don’t know what your parents did or how you were treated at home. But I do know that you o yourself up. I’m not going to do it for you if you won’t even do the bare minimum.” At that, she dropped me and my face actually hit pavement. My nose warmed up and I was certain I was bleeding. “If you want to keep making everything about your misery, you y here until the cold takes you. Or, you try to enjoy your life.” She crossed her arms and gred at me. “Whichever you choose, I’ll support you. So, what’s your choice. And take a mio think it over,” she y remark, “especially since you’re drunk.”

  I gred at her as I thought over my circumstances. I was alone on the holidays. I’d always bee slightly depressed during them, but that was when I had someone, and now that I didn’t, it was effeg me very poorly. I was also massively drunk, no longer being able to handle alcohol as well since I started HRT. My leg felt like it was on fire from the scrape, the fall having hurt me more than I expected. And now my nose was bleeding out while a beautiful woma me as I was slowly freezing to death.

  Okay, maybe she’s right. I’m still not happy about that. I must’ve been sitting there for a few mirying to get my drunk mind to ply as she had started tapping her foot long ago. Just as I was cluding what I’d do, she angrily ented, “Well? I don’t have all night.”

  I decided to swallow my pride and do something that pained me to my core. I bowed my head and said, “I need help. Please.” Tears had started to form, remembering all the times I tried asking for help but was told no for one reason or another. My parents always had a reason to not help me, and I internalized that to just never ask for help. As I was g, I felt a haly touch my shoulder.

  Looking up, I saw Naomi croug down to look me in the eye with a sad smile on her face. “Hey, it’s okay. You did good in asking for help. e o’s get you in my car, stop your nose from bleeding, a you to my home where it’s warm, okay?” I nodded and realized my nose had been bleeding so much that it was all over my shirt. Naomi helped me up and walked me over to her car. She reached the driver side door and reached in, taking out a tissue from the tral partment and ha bae. “Here, use this to stop the bleeding. There’s more if it’s not enough.

  She then grabbed me by the arm and led me to the passenger side. I was thankful that she made sure I didn’t hit my head on the way in, as I was about to wheopped me from doing so. I was a total wreaomi walked around and I could see her texting someone as she made her way to sit in the driver’s seat. I gave her a questioning look when she was starting the car and she replied, “That was your parents. I wao let them know you were with me. I lied and said you were alright to not worry them. Try not to iure, okay? They’re good people, even through their fws.”

  I don’t know what she saw in my parents, but it obviously wasn’t what I’d seen. She apparently saw me scowling at the thought and snapped, “Hey! Not tonight! You want to be miserable tomorrow, fine, but tonight you try to work on yourself or this is the st time I help you, got it?” I stared at her, mouth agape, trying to put this all together.

  So, she’s just like my parents, huh? Always has to have things her way, ahat does e is ditional on doing something for her. And why is it that I’m always being told to perform emotional bor? I’m not happy! I shouldn’t have to pretend at being happy! ’t someone just help for the sake of it once?

  I stayed quiet the entire ride to Naomi’s home and it was quite rge, at least for city living. She pulled in behind her house and parked the car. “Okay,” she turo me. “I want to y out some ground rules. I have guests over tonight, you don’t have to eh anyone if you don’t want to, but it wouldn’t kill you to do so. My wife also is here, hosting while I’ve been out looking for you. She’s probably pretty tired from having to host alone for so long since I assumed you’d be a good girl and been at home. Yoing to thank her for tending to the party alone due to your absence. And when the m es, we’re going to talk about what yoing to do with yourself.” As I tried to talk, she cut me off again. “No, zip it. Nht now. You’re still very drunk and I don’t want to try dealing with your ramblings. In. The. M. Got it?” I nodded numbly and she smiled. “Good, the’s head inside. I’m starving.”

  I got out and followed her into her home to a bizarre gathering of people.