“Why?” asked Marley. “Why Delmar 2?”

  “Because the money is on Delmar 2.” Greg explained.

  “My cousin is also on Delmar 2, so is my jerk father, so are most of the guys who beat me up in school, some of them are probably still in the same grade. Those idiots couldn’t pass even the Delmarian education standards, and we have a really, really low curve.”

  “Plus this is highly immoral and I forbid it.” Izzy said crossing her arms.

  “How is it immoral? We’re visiting a foreign world, following their customs and rules and using their own economic system to do what they do, and make a living with what we’re good at. It’s business, we’re not even exploiting any cheats or shady taboo’s that Delmarians consider bad.” Greg explained.

  “Greg, you can't just go Fupar a bunch of bunnies to death and take their shit to re-sell. That’s barbaric and wrong.”

  “It’s their culture. They invented Fuparing, it’s a legitimate career on Delmar 2, or any planet with a Delmar in the name. . Plus we're not doing it for the stuff, the family's get that back, we want the gambling money the degenerates piss away on Fupar betting." Greg noted.

  “It's not wrong because you're gambling, it's wrong because you’re a gigantic unstoppable monster who could snap them like twigs without any competition.”

  “Oh so I’m not allowed to play with the others because I’m too good? I’m being penalized for being created this way. I’m being excluded because I’m too awesome? I can almost physically see the hate and judgment in the air. I thought you 22nd century kids were progressive and hip.” he scoffed.

  “Greg, with great power comes great responsibility” Izzy reminded.

  “And great bitches.” Lawg added.

  "I do like bitches." Greg shrugged.

  “I’m ignoring that since I find it offensive, especially given my role as you're …friend with benefits.” she sugar-coated.

  “Rounding up from 50 percent. Other Izzy is inarguably a hardcore bitch.” Greg shrugged. "That means over half of you are at least 1 bitch."

  “I hate your correct math.” She snipped “But it’s still morally wrong. You are knowingly taking advantage of your vastly overpowered set of attributes.”

  “Our responsibility is to our crew and their lack of food and water, mostly water because Lawg Blew 90 percent of the water supply out the airlock a few days ago. That cleanup cost almost as much as a new ship. These squishy little things with their fragile metabolisms could die without resources. How long can a human survive without food or water? A week? 2 Weeks maybe” Greg asked.

  “Rule of 3.” Duffy admitted. “3 weeks without food, 3 weeks without sleep, 3 days without water, 3 minutes without oxygen.”

  “Holy shit…3 minutes without oxygen?” Greg gasped in shock. “They are just moments away from death every day of their short, delicate life. How do any of you make it to ten?” he asked, looking at Izzy.

  “Thanks, dude…I feel significant and secure now.” Marley sighed.

  “They’re like children or puppies, or gerbils. If we don’t feed and water and vodka them, they’ll die, and that’s our great responsibility.” Greg said with a heartfelt solemn tone.

  “I’m not a warrior, Greg. I don’t weight lives and do the math, casually carry the loser to the slaughtering block. I’m an art major with a minor in archery. I’m borderline Vegan!” she said.

  “You eat pounds and pounds of meat all the time.” Marley corrected.

  “I said practically vegan, meat is delicious, it’s hard to avoid that and we don’t have the luxury of printing meat on this ship, it’s too resource heavy. I don’t eat people though, so for my species I’m kinda almost practically a vegetarian.” She defended.

  “It’s like you people don’t know what words mean.” Marley sighed.

  “So if it wasn’t me, being so overpowered and huge, you’d be fine with anyone else making money off Fupar, within the confines of the Delmarian culture?” Greg asked.

  “If I say yes, you’ll just present a loophole that voids my argument, so I’ll just stand here.” Izzy said dryly.

  “We can’t Fupar for shit.” Lawg noted.

  “We do suck.” Marley noted. “I’d basically just scream and run and then die, Lawg would cry and pee, and then die. Duffy could handle maybe one or two fights if we didn’t get any big-brand champs but we can’t make enough money off a few small fights. Plus she still might die at some point, if they bring out someone good. The only one on this ship that could survive that gauntlet, are you guys, and you already said Greg was unfair.” Marley shrugged. Greg smiled nervously at Izzy.

  “Oh come on, that’s just wrong. You want me to go kill people and get beaten up?” she scoffed.

  “No, of course not. I would fight to keep you safe.” Greg said as Duffy made a cutesy face at him. “Because I’m a man and I need routine trim, obviously.” He added. “However…hear me out. You do have 2 spare bodies…her me out…we already know I can pilot an Izzy. Hear me out…one is grossly underpowered. Stop judging me.”

  “You wanna borrow my body to go kill people?” Izzy glared.

  “Just borrow the prototype, you won’t even experience any discomfort if you leave it on observer mode. Plus I built it so it's arguably as much mine as yours. This isn’t training, it’s a job. Think of the pathetic children.” He begged.

  “Greg you can barely cook when you’re inside me. Stop laughing Lawg, this is serious.” She scolded. “But you can barely cook, let alone fight in mortal combat.

  “So you’re saying I would no longer be at a huge advantage and unfairly outclassing the competition?” he asked with a smirk.

  “Damnit Greg, stop being rationally correct when it opposed my argument.”

  “You know even if you pull rank and make me stay on the ship I can still do this because it’s a remote feed, and by Osirian Law, technically, the spare bodies are my property because I paid for the material with my credits. So I kinda literally own your ass…just the two new ones, not the origonal.” He pointed out. She stared angrily as he eyes glowed blue. “Nope, should have just left it at the last point. That was a mistake, I regret that immediately."

  “Good luck getting any of this for a long time.” She said defiantly.

  “Guess I better enjoy your body on Delmar as much as I can then, to hold me over.” He joked. “I am making this worse on myself. I acknowledge that. Anyway let’s go make some money." he encouraged.

  “Seriously?” asked the Delmarian behind the counter. “A girl?”

  “Hey, I may be female, but the rules say women can compete in Fupar too and I qualify as the heavyweight division, I’m a big girl!” said GregIzzy.

  “Greg, stop calling me fat, you already aren’t getting laid this week."

  “Stop nagging yourself and me” GregIzzy muttered. The clerk looked confused.

  “You do realize Fupar is to the death, and that by dying in the ring, you lose all worldly possessions…and also die?" the bunny said.

  “Naaaaw…ya think? I don’t own anything, I legally signed away my shit this morning.” he or She grinned.

  “Most Delmarians aren’t that smart. Okay Lady, sign here. Need a fingerprint. Okay you are officially property of Delmar for the next 48 hours or until you win 4 fights in a row. Obviously if you lose you’re dead and it doesn’t matter but legally we own the corpse. It’s completely irrelevant but I have to inform contenders. You’ve been informed."

  “I got a spare, it’s fine.” GregIzzy said as the confused Delmarian stamped the paper.

  “I’d like to make a bet.” Marley said, standing on his tiptoes to reach the counter.

  “Which contender?” the gambling bunny asked.

  “The big, chubby, hairless chick.” Marley said. Izzy, back on the ship observing, tossed her hands up.

  “Does everyone think I’m fat?” she asked Lawg.

  “To be fair I think everyone is fat. I’m incredibly shallow and vape.” Lawg beamed. Proudly.

  “Vapid.” She corrected.

  “Isn’t a vapid one of those things you smoke?” he asked.

  “Sir, this is a voucher for starship and a used prison transport.” the Delmarian said to Marley.

  “Yep, that’s my signature. William Lawg. Can I get 34,000 blood credits?” Marley asked.

  “MY SHIP!” yelled Lawg watching the viewscreen from GregIzzy’s eyes.

  “Shut up, we can’t lose.” assured Izzy

  “These are the baddest mother-fluffers in the galaxy. Bunnies are brutal around here. How tough are you people, exactly?” Lawg asked.

  “Pretty durable.” She admitted. “I’m banging Greg, and I never die?” she asked.

  “That’s the first time I’m happy having that knowledge.” Lawg nodded.

  “Alright, here we go.” GregIzzy said. The doors opened and trumpets sounded as the announcer clicked on the mic.

  “Fluffers and puffballs, Gents and Giants. We have a new challenger for the Great Muggsy!”

  “Muggsy?” chuckled GregIzzy. “This is gonna be easy.”

  “Oh nice.” Marley smiled. “I hate that guy. He gave me swirlys in 3rd grade.”

  A nearly 7 foot 3 roid-bunny stepped into the ring, covered in tattoos and snarling with his gold teeth, grabbing an axe off the rack and flexing with a roar. He was supporting a full set of stag-antlers.

  “Hu..” muttered GregIzzy, realizing enemies look way bigger when your way smaller. "That's one big furry."

  “You guys have antlers?” Asked Izzy

  “Oh yea, it’s common to cut them down so you can wear a space helmet or cool trendy hats. Fupar fighters grown them out." he nodded.

  “Doesn’t that make you feel less masculine?” asked Lawg.

  “Lawg, their horns, not genitals, they just get in the way and snag on stuff. Actually now that I say it aloud so do genitals.” Marley pondered.

  Muggsy took off sprinting and each footstep quickened as he neared GregIzzy. She dug her heels in and readied for a counterstrike.

  “Did we just do something stupid?” asked Lawg.

  GregIzzy bounced off the wall, flopping face-down in the dirt and sliding to a slow stop.

  “Oh, that sucked.” GregIzzy wheezed, peeling herself up and rolling one eye back to the front.

  “I thought you were undestuctable.” Lawg said to Izzy.

  “Indestructible doesn’t mean I weigh more. It’s physics. That bunny is a hundred pounds heavier than me. And we intentionally made the prototype way underpowered so Greg wouldn’t overheat and the blow ship to pieces. We don’t have any spare antimatter power cells so we went oldschool nuclear and scaled down." Izzy informed.

  “So we bitchified our champion?” Lawg asked.

  “He wanted a challenge and I wanted it to be reasonably fair.” She shrugged.

  GregIzzy took a haymaker to the face and spun to hit the wall face-first, before being grabbed by the neck and yanked back into the fight.

  “Um…why are we losing?” asked Marley into his mic.

  “We’re not.” Assured Izzy.

  “Are you even watching the fight? Don’t you have Gregvision?” Marley asked.

  “We turned that off, all that spinning was making Lawg sick.”

  “Huaaaah.” Lawg heaved into the trashcan.

  Duffy looked very concerned.

  “So…Izzy.” She asked carefully. “Why is Greg-you getting hamburgerfied and not fighting back?”

  “He wanted a fight, so I dialed down the power output to 6 percent.” She said, trying not to visibly smile.

  A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

  “You really ARE the evil Izzy. You do realize if we lose, we lost the ship and everything?” Duffy reminded.

  “Relax, it’s not point based, it’s a fight to the death. It’s still a tank of a body, so he can't actually lose no matter how much of a savage pummeling he get’s and how long it takes for that giant bunny to wear out. We can't bleed to death, we don’t have vulnerable organs. He could still fight back as a limbless truck.”

  “That’s brilliant.” Duffy gasped with a smirk.

  “Yea it kinda is.” Izzy chuckled.

  “My tits!” GregIzzy wheezed as she peeled herself off the wall again, rubbing her sore entire front side. GregIzzy looked back at the rapidly approaching hulkbunny and suddenly smirked, and then lifelessly fell forward. Just as the beast approached to deliver a kill, GregIzzy landed with her palms on the ground and sent a hefty horse-kick into the oblivious bunny’s throat, sending him reeling to one side, dropping his axe. GregIzzy jumped up on his back and grabbed a handful of hair, and the arena rail with the other hand, slamming Muggsy’s face into the stone wall, 3 times in quick session. GregIzzy backflipped off and almost nailed a superhero landing except sliding back in the dirt from the momentum and hunkering own dramatically.

  “Oh that was impressive.” Marley said looking shocked. Izzy blinked slowly.

  “I guess I forgot he’s still got thousands of years experienced, and is proficient in tactical maneuvers.” Izzy said looking shocked and disappointed.

  “So you just assumed he relied entirely on being huge and strong?” asked Lawg.

  “Lil bit.” Izzy said face-palming. GregIzzy turned and noticed her reflection in one of the shields hanging off the wall as she posed in a glorious landing.

  “I am so turned on by me, right now!” GregIzzy smiled, extending her fangs and lighting her eyes up blue, blowing a kiss to her reflection.

  She took off sprinting and stumbled a little on a low spot before correcting and then tripping completely, sliding over and getting back up.

  “Balance is so weird.” She grunted, grabbing the Axe and doing a John-Carter leap through the air, swinging the axe and making connection with Muggsy and the wall. The crowd went wild, cheering and chanting “Bald Chick! Bald Chick!”

  “Really?” Bald Chick is my fighter name?” Izzy complained.

  “Compared to us you're pretty bald.” Marley muttered. “We’re bunnies. Luxurious fur from toes to ear tips. Only swimmers and fighters with tats shave. ”

  “Not hot-chick, or busty badass?” Izzy complained. “I’m just the bald chick?”

  “Hey, stop whining we just won a shitload of money. Bald is trending right now. You should shave the head and just own it. You’d be shocked how many dudes go crazy for a tall, bald blue chick, especially if she’s slightly crazy. Big, blue, bald bitches are hot right now.” Marley shrugged.

  “Gross.” Izzy whispered as GregIzzy strutted around and did fist-pumps in the air while also chanting “Bald Chick!” She did a power stance and let out a roar, swinging her boobs in a circular motion and shaking the bloody axe.

  “Wow, He’s really making the victory dance as vulgar as humanly possible.” Marley nodded calmly. “Osirianly possible?”

  “MORE MEAT!” roared GregIzzy as the gates opened.

  “So you really showed him, didn’t you?” Lawg smirked. “Taught him a lesson in why violence is wrong, and in no way embarrassed yourself in the process.” He giggled. Izzy abruptly threw a light jab to his face, knocking him out cold.

  “Crap, that is actually pretty fun. Why do I feel like I’ve done that a lot?”

  “Old Izzy didn’t tell you anything bout her past did she?” GregIzzy laughed, taking a hammer to the face and bouncing right into a left hook from the other fighter that was teaming up on him.

  “Noooooo.” She whined, looking sad and slouching like a teenager who just found out she can’t borrow the car this weekend. She clenched her fists and stomped her foot adorably. “That’s not fair. Am I a clone of a violent killer?" she pouted.

  “Oh yea, those were dark times.” GregIzzy informed, doubling over from a boot to the stomach. A sword suddenly came down and right through her back, out her chest, right below the sternum. The crowd gasped and the Dipshits all winced in horror, frozen in shock as Izzy didn’t seem to look concerned.

  "Guys." Izzy casually informed. "That's not a killshot for us, he's fine."

  “OW!” Whezed GregIzzy, reaching back and snapping off the broadsword. She swung the shorter broken end, slashed the Bunny to her left across the face, sending him back screaming. The other looked terrified as GregIzzy slowly pulled the larger sword half the rest of the way through, grabbing the blade like a full sword and looking very upset.

  “You fucked up my blouse.” GregIzzy snarled, eyes turning white. The big buff Jackelope ran away screaming. GregIzzy chased him around the ring with the halfsword.

  “That’s why I wouldn’t let him use my good bras.” Izzy sighed.

  “No, get back here. You did this, you gotta pay for it. Stop running away Peter-cotton-bitch. Turn around fight a woman in pubic Fupar like a real man!” GregIzzy yelled, tying to keep up.

  “Oh that was a brutal one.” Marley nodded. “Lotta blood spray, he got like 6 feet. That lucky kid in the bleachers got a good souvenir. You know you can freeze the eyes and preserve them in plastic and they look exactly like that forever. My cousin has a walking cane with an Eye on the handle. Pretty classy cane.” Marley yawned to Duffy.

  “Why does he walk with a cane?” she asked

  “Fupar” Marley nodded.

  “Yep, called it.” She nodded, munching her popcorn.

  Izzy grabbed her communication node and began hotwiring it to the mainframe computer to contact home. The screen made a dial tone and Older Izzy answered.

  "Hello sweetheart, haven't heard from you in 2 days. How are things?" Older Izzy asked.

  “Are you freaking kidding me?” Izzy yelled at the grainy communicator screen on her laptop. Older Izzy looked hesitant to answer "Were you a warlord?" she asked.

  “Those were brutal times, before humans accepted us.” Defended older Izzy.

  “You killed people?” Young Izzy yelled.

  “Define “people” said Older Izzy nervously on the screen.

  “Humans.”

  “Yes.” She squinted. "occasionally."

  “Any of our own kind?” asked Young Izzy.

  “Define “our own kind” specifically. She painfully admitted.

  “Sis, what the hell? How many people have you killed?” Young Izzy hollered.

  “Very few, considering we were at war, and most of them were in self defense…and some were more like retaliation…or food.”

  “Sis.” She whined. “You’ve eaten human? You gave Greg hell for that. You made me eat printed meat for 18 years. That’s bullshit. I can't even have a real BLT and you used to eat people?"

  “You should be glad you never had to fight for your life.” Older Izzy scolded. "You think war is fun?"

  "Greg seems to think so." Young Izzy quipped.

  "He's a bad example." she scoffed. "But sometimes it can be."

  “Ow.” GregIzzy grunted as a large beam of timber whacked him/her in the back, driving him/her into the dirt.

  “You were cloned during times of peace and prosperity, young lady. You never had to hunt and be hunted, you never slept in the rain with one eye open because another warring faction could walk in and kill your humans. I’ve slept with one eye open!” Old Izzy defended.

  "Is that why we have that weird eye-twitch thing?"

  “My friggin eye!” GregIzzy yelled, pulling out an arrow and shaking with anger. "Why does everyone aim for the eye, that hurts so bad! I would be furious if that was permanent! Eyes and crotch, is nothing off limits to you people?” She roared. The other fighter she forgot about, ran in from behind and gave a swift kick to the crotch. She dropped and wheezed, pausing for a moment and standing back up.

  “Oh right, that hurts a lot less than I expected. Still bad, definitely a lot less.” She said grabbing the foot and punching out the knee. She grabbed the hammer from the dirt and finished him off with a headshot.

  “Go for the Delfarbs!” Marley shouted, shaking his big foam finger. Duffy handed him the popcorn and lifted her shirt to show her belly painted with “Bald chick” in blue letters.

  “We’re making so much money right now!” Duffy shouted, jumping up and down.

  “I don’t even care how gross that is because I’m making so much money right now!” Marley cheered and high-fived. "Bald Chick rules!"

  “Everything about me is a lie, and you can’t even tell yourself the truth, that’s so messed up Sis.” Young Izzy yelled to the screen of Older Izzy.

  “See? I’m a mess, now you know why I made a me without all that baggage. You’re lucky I made you from a clean slate, do you know how messed up you’d be if you were unedited me? I do, because I am unedited me, and all of us have Issues. We’ve seen some shit. You think having a curfew and being homeschooled is rough, try taking a dagger to the spine. It hurts really bad.”

  “It hurts so bad.” groaned GregIzzy, pulling a knife from her spine and suddenly turning with a massive overhand windmill throw, lodging it in the face of the Delmarian that was just about to trample her from behind. The crowd cheered. The gates opened. “How many did I sign up for?” GregIzzy sighed with exhaustion.

  “Greg isn’t that bad, Sis. We actually get along sometimes. Not very often, but he’s actually a sweet guy from time to time. He’s not the monster you warned me about.”

  “Yes he is!” Older Izzy yelled back.

  “No he’s not. He’s just misunderstood! At least he is honest bout his past, sis. He’s just a complicated man, not some dumb warrior king like you told me.” Young Izzy defended.

  GregIzzy stood up on the headless bunny-beast, holding the head by the antlers and breathing out a hot radioactive roar as the blood ran down her face.

  “BOW BEFORE YOUR WARRIOR KING!!!” she roared in a fairly deep masculine voice for a chick, slowly pulling the antlers apart and splitting the skull like a wishbone. GregIzzy tossed them side and triumphantly and ripped her shirt open like pro-wrestler as the crowd gasped, then yelled again in cheers. She looked down.

  “Oops, forgot about those. That's embarrassing for somebody” She chuckled.

  “Oh great.” Young Izzy huffed, checking the other window tab and seeing herself topless, waving around a sword “And now everyone on Delmar has seen my tits. That's great."

  “What?” asked older Izzy.

  “Nothing…just...watching a movie. A really, really bad movie.”

  “Izzy, sweetie. I’m not mad at you.” Older Izzy said looking very mad at her. “But I need you to be honest with me right now.”

  “Why, you lied to me for 22 years.”

  “Please…just don’t sleep with him to piss me off. I know how I was at your age, and I know it gets lonely in space, just please just don’t screw Greg.” She begged. Younger Izzy looked furious at all the bullshit. She paused and took a deep breath to calm herself.

  “Sis…I’m already screwing Greg.”

  “MOTHERFU-”

  “Izzy closed the laptop.” She sighed and shook her head.

  “God, I’m such a big blue bitch sometimes.” She whispered.

  She strolled sadly to the bridge, hearing the celebration already in progress, as everyone else cheered and GregIzzy staggered around, holding a big gold chalice shaped like a Delmarian skull, also carrying a real Delmarian skull in the other hand.

  “I see you treated my body like an- oh lord, where are my fingers?” she gasped in horror as GregIzzy looked down at the remaining 3 on the left hand. She looked up with a missing eyes and her shirt tied back together, covered in orange blood. Some of it blue.

  “So…I'mma fix this body. We made a lot of money." GregIzzy explained, still dripping fresh blood.

  "Oh for shit-sake I thought they were just gonna beat you up a little. I am so sorry." she apologized.

  "Nah, it's fine. Kinda fun actually." She said as a tooth fell out on the floor. "I got some wicked cool souvenirs, gonna make an antler chandelier for the den." GregIzzy said.

  "Isn't that pretty morbid to have a dead Delmarian decoration with a Delmarian crewman living with us?"

  "They apparently find it very normal." Greg shrugged. Marley smiled.

  "I got a thumb!" Marley said, holding it up proudly.

  "See…kids had fun. We should do family vacations more often, you work so hard and they miss you." GregIzzy Joked.

  "I just have no words." she said looking lost.

  "Thanks Chickgreg in the Izzysuit for the cool gifts and making enough money to survive and eat, and buy new chairs and stuff. That's one possible thing." GregIzzy said, powering down so normal Greg could enter the conversation moments later and I wouldn’t have to keep typing GregIzzy anymore.

  "Oh that’s way better, all ten fingers and that one extra digit I've been missing all day." he grinned.

  "I just told me I was doing you." Izzy sighed.

  "And how did you take it, when you told yourself you were already taking it?"

  "She freaked out. Kinda thought it would be satisfying to see her freak out, but then I just felt ashamed." She admitted.

  "No offense taken." Greg nodded, shuffling away to the cheerful dipshits.

  "Hey Greg…does this technically make you a tranny?" asked Lawg asked.

  "I do not even care." he shrugged.

  "That's a cool answer." Mar nodded. "Hey Izzy, did you see how cool Greg was with your body?"

  "Yea, I seem to giving my body out with every oil change now don’t I?" she said shuffling sadly.

  "Cheer up Izzy." Duffy said, comforting her with a hug despite being covered in game-paint and chili-cheese dog stains. "All men are kinda barbarians, minus the literal alien viscera. I know it's tough telling your adopted clone mother/sister that you are doing the guy she doesn’t approve of, but she still loves you…she's just super pissed right now. It will pass. Plus now that you know you have a violent history too, you have a lot in common with your boyfriend. Turns out you're both clones of alien death-machines…you just had your memory wiped of it and Greg has it freshly painted on the cargo bay walls. We've all been there." Bluffed Duff

  "I'm a Universe away and I can't escape my destiny. No matter how far I get sucked through a wormhole and how much I think I'm nothing like her…it finds it's way back to me. Last month I protested animal cruelty at a college rally and today I watched myself yank the heads off like 8 bunnies to the choir of a cheering crowd. And then I violently punched out Lawg."

  "We've basically all done that last one at least once. He has that effect on people, that doesn’t even count."

  "It's like I have a violent soul that won't let me completely disconnect. Are we just monsters with a good coat of paint and polish?" Izzy asked.

  "Probably…I think we all are to some degree or another. Obviously Greg to a much more literal degree, but you get the metaphor. At least you aren't the last of your species, or alone on a shuttle pod for 18 months. You got a man who protects you and still lets you protect yourself and BE yourself, he doesn’t try and change who you are, and he's loyal. They're never perfect, Honey…today you found out you aren't either. Space sucks, but you can enjoy the little things, like a guy you can count on and a buttload of gambling money split 5 ways. Your clone sister/mom isn't here, so whatever she hates about Greg, let that be her problem. You aren't her, you just came from the same starting point. Make your own messed-up history the way you want to. If she got to make her own mistakes then why can't you make yours? You may even do better than she did by accident." Duffy said giving her another hug.

  "Space is weird. Idonlike-it." she pouted.

  "Go…go to him you beautiful, enormous, alien, Amazon bitch." Duffy whispered. "Go claim your barbarian."

  "Why not? Only other options are another chick, a retard and a pok-a-mon." she sighed.

  "Exactly." Duffy whispered. "Exactly."